Bianka's Beeswax

Parenting 101

2011-10-01T08:46:00.003-04:00

When bathing your children, it's easier to give them their toothbrushes in the tub. You avoid a messy mirror with all of the enthusiastic spitting.

However, in the event that your son is not into his bath that day and wishes to exit early, do not turn your back on him while washing your daughters hair. The following may happen:

You may turn around to find him dipping his toothbrush into the toilet bowl, using it to slurp up water to drink. How refreshing!

Lazy

2011-08-23T22:16:00.002-04:00

Haha my husband just said he was "about to wake up the lazy babies" at 7pm from their late nap. It's just such a funny thought to me to think of babies as lazy. Especially mine, who NEVER. STOP. TALKING.

Humor

2011-08-19T06:16:00.004-04:00

The other day when AJ woke up from his nap and I went into his room, we had the following conversation:

Me: Hi Boo!
AJ: Mama. What.
Me: What's wet? Are you wet?
AJ: Mama WHAT.
Me: (Clearly not understanding) Did you pee in your bed?
AJ: WHAT Mama WHAATTT.
Me: AJ.. What!?!
AJ: (Jumping up and down) CHICKIE BUTT!!!

One of my favorite things is seeing the emerging senses of humors my kids have. They are different from each other, but I love them both!

A song

2011-08-09T08:01:00.002-04:00

Madeline's song:

I love Mama

I love Fruits and Vegetables

I love Christmas lights

But I can't eat Christmas lights

Because Christmas lights are bad for you.

Chicken Pox

2011-07-31T07:56:00.001-04:00

Maddie has Chicken "pops"!

She's doing quite well.. she says they itch a little bit, but they don't seem to be bothering her at all.

It's funny how many chicken pox party requests I got right away!

A.J. is next!

Happy Birthday my boy!

2011-07-17T07:58:00.002-04:00

My tiny baby boy is two years old. I can't believe it. TWO. He's a small person now. I don't have any babies in my house!

He is my child that is full of smiles and giggles. He is generous with kisses, offering them on full wet squishy lips. He likes to share hugs or "ugs". He likes trains, cars, Cars (the movie), Lightning McQueen or "Piston Cup", dinosaurs or "BoarSoars", helicopters or "dopters", and trucks or "Fu---"... trashcan fu--s, fire fu--s, big fu--s, and on and on. He is a very strong swimmer. He is not very good at throwing balls still, flinging his arm upwards and jumping to get the ball going in some random direction (unlike his sister who can launch a fast ball past her Dada), but he is quite good at kicking the ball around. He is emotional and sensitive. The first few times he needed to be gently scolded or told "no", his bottom lip stuck out and he would cry right away. Thankfully he's gotten more used to it, and he's a quick learner. He wears his heart on his sleeve.

He's so smart, they're both so very smart. I love watching him play with a toy and poke out his lip and try to figure out how it works. I love listening to he and his sister have conversations with each other now.

I watch A.J. and Maddie play together sometimes and I feel.. I don't know. Almost sad in a way. Obviously not because they're playing together, but because I know I am going to miss this some day. Their smallness. I'm sure most parents reading this know what I mean without having to explain it, because trying to explain it is making me cry. :) At the same time though, it's SOOOOO amazing watching them grow up and learn and feel and experience!

Anyway, happy birthday my squishy little boy! You're TWO!!

Gluten Free

2011-06-09T07:49:00.001-04:00

A.J. has been my special baby, as far as medical needs go. Remember this? His legs are good and strong now, you can't even tell that at one point his legs were not even able to be straight! His toes are still stacked funny like that, but he doesn't seem to mind. It makes This Little Piggy extra fun!

One day, about a year and a half ago at his 9 month checkup, I noticed that A.J.'s growth had significantly slowed down. He had consistently been in the 99% of height and weight, but at that 9 month check up he had dropped down to the 70 something percentile. In only a matter of three months. For the next several check ups it kept dropping, until at one point he was in the 40 something percent for height or weight, I don't remember, but I was hounding the pediatrician at every appointment. He kept assuring me that it's common for breastfed babies to suddenly average out. My maternal instincts were just screaming at me that it wasn't right somehow. My husband is 6'7", I am 5'8", and my daughter is the tallest in her class. It didn't make sense.

I eventually put together a few seemingly unrelated symptoms and decided that A.J. had a gluten allergy! A simple blood test confirmed it a few weeks later. His symptoms were the sudden growth slow down, chronic soft stools, anemia, pica, and I've always had a suspicion that John had something similar as well.

So we are a gluten free family now! It has not been a hard transition, we ate fairly "clean" at home as it was. Eating out is where it becomes troublesome.. fast food choices are scarce, restaurants serve bread at the table, etc. Anyway, in a few short weeks the difference is already noticeable! A.J. hasn't licked any more walls, his poops are solid, and he really seems to have grown a whole inch now that his body is absorbing nutrients! Yay for healthy babies!!

I hope this is the last of A.J.'s, or Maddie's for that matter, health concerns!

Empathy

2011-05-19T07:49:00.001-04:00

Our family was out and about one afternoon this summer and a fire truck went zooming past. Since AJ and Maddie are huge fans of fire trucks we decided to follow. As we got close to the ocean, out of my passenger side window I spotted a HUGE column of black smoke. We decided to be lookie loos and see what was going on.

We pulled up at a house build on the beach and it was fully engulfed in flames. We watched the fire fighters do their job bravely and try to put out the flames. The houses next door eventually started to burn as well, and the middle one came crashing to the ground. These houses are HUGE.. more or less mini mansions on the beach.

It started to get crowded there on the street so we made our way to the beach side of the house. It was obvious who the family members were that lived in the house. They had a small pile of belongings in the sand in front of them and they were huddled together just watching. Not sad, not angry, just watching. John explained to Madeline that that's the family whose home was burned by the fire, and that all of their things are gone.

She asked John if the family could stay with us since they didn't have a place to sleep, and asked a few more questions. Then, totally unprompted, my 3 1/2 year old little girl walked shyly up to the family with John's hand in hers and said "I'm sorry about your home."

Sometimes she just makes me so darn proud.

Little Boys

2011-03-31T01:57:00.003-04:00

We are in the process of letting AJ potty train himself. We did the same with Maddie, mostly just let her figure it out on her own. We let them run around naked and they quickly figure out where to put the stuff that comes out. Yes, we went through a couple loads of small towels.

Apparently little boys, uh.. "signal" that they have to go pee because their uh.. "antenna" sticks out a little. My husband tells me this is normal. I wouldn't know, I have never peed out of a penis before.

So anyway, I have been encouraging AJ to go to the toilet to go pee pee because he has been "signaling". He sits on the potty and immediately jumps back up and hollers "DONE!" and is so proud of himself. (The potty is empty). Today as I was sweeping and vacuuming the downstairs and AJ was stacking random objects and congratulating himself, I noticed he had to go. So I encouraged him to go put his pee pee in the toilet.

Into the bathroom he went and onto the potty he sat, and on the potty he stayed for a full 5 seconds before jumping up and hollering DONE. I was mildly excited as I went into the bathroom to check the potty for pee pee. It was empty. That's alright, I thought. At least he actually sat there for a few seconds. Maybe he's starting to get it. For the next 20 minutes AJ went back and forth from his stacking task to the potty as I kept encouraging him.

On one of his bathroom trips he stands in the trashcan and started playing with the plunger as he likes to do, and I went and put the vacuum cleaner away across the hall. I was still calling out to him to put his pee pee in the toilet. I hear AJ call out "Uh oh. Towel." And he comes to me and asks me again "Towel!" I again get mildly excited because I think OH YAY! AJ peed in the toilet! He missed but he peed in the toilet!

I go into the bathroom with a towel to wipe up the spill, and.. find the TRASHCAN full of pee and little pee footprints across the bathroom. It's one of those wicker trashcans with the fabric lining. Sigh.

Meat..

2010-11-13T06:49:00.003-05:00

So Maddie is pretty much in the princess phase now (along with the WHY phase which started 3 days ago). She likes princess dresses and musicals and pink and ruffles etc. etc. etc.

John has a Little Mermaid CD in the car for her that she insists gets played every time we go somewhere. She also insists that I sing along.

The other night I was tucking her in and she requested the Part of Your World song as her lullaby. I began and couldn't get more than one sentence into the song without being corrected.. and I had to stifle my laughter the rest of the way through the song. My first error?

Me: "Look at this stuff, isn't it neat?"
Maddie: "No, meat."
Me: "Meat? Oh, sorry. Look at this stuff. Isn't it meat? Wouldn't you think my collection's complete?"

I sang the rest of the song imagining I was singing about an underwater cave full of sausages and hams and roasts and steaks a hundred deep.

Dinner at my place

2010-11-11T07:10:00.002-05:00

Typically dinner time at my house consists of AJ in his high chair shoved off to the side and throwing his food, Maddie walking laps around the table, me getting up countless times to get something else, and John answering a dozen text messages a minute.

The other night, though..... The other night... it was wonderful. I made healthy chicken nuggets (Out of the Eat-Clean series of cookbooks.. you've GOT to try it!) with real honey mustard dipping sauce. I pushed AJ's high chair right up against the table, Maddie sat across from him, John put his phone away, and everything that was needed was already at the table.

I looked at everyone and smiled and said "My whole family is at the table!" It made me so happy to have everyone there! The kids couldn't eat those nuggets fast enough. At one point, John got up to use the restroom though, and Maddie said "Mama your whole family is going pee pee." I think I'll start another series of Funny Things Kids Say.

After a few minutes AJ looked at Maddie and blew a raspberry. Maddie blew one back and soon they had each other cracking up in fits of baby giggles. I swooned with happiness.. John asked me if this is everything I always dreamed of. Yes, my dear husband! Giggles around the dinner table are absolutely a dream come true!

Happiness is...

2010-07-22T01:59:00.002-04:00

Happiness is... my little girl with her bouncing curly pigtails, and her too big Barbie princess dress, dancing along with the dancing princess Barbies in her Twelve Dancing Princesses movie, turns around and takes my hands and says "Mama, dance with me."

Happiness is... my little girl Swiffering the whole kitchen floor while I put her brother to bed, spilling her full cup of milk, and having it all wiped up and clean before I even get downstairs.

Happiness is... my baby boy saying Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy Happy... Buta Buta Buta Buta Buta Buta to me on my birthday, then to himself on his!

Happiness is... my daughter and son singing at the tops of their lungs in the back seat of the car. Out of tune. Different songs.

Happiness is... the quiet few minutes of snuggles when my children first wake up, before the 500 decibels of noise and mess begins.

Happiness is... when the 500 decibels of noise and mess begins.

Happiness is... goodnight kisses and hugs and I love you's called back and forth your whole way down the stairs.

I love you John, Maddie, and AJ!!!

Strawberry Shortcake and friends

2010-07-16T02:15:00.003-04:00

I celebrated my 6th birthay in Austria (Alps, not Kangaroos). I was there with my grandmother and grandfather visiting his sister and her family. I had a lovely time playing with my cousins Alexander and Evelyn. I adored Evelyn.. she was about 4 years older than me and she had the most wonderful clothes. She sent me home with a lot of clothes that she had outgrown. I especially loved the flowery twirly skirt with matching peasant blouse!

My mother mailed me a birthday present for me to open on my birthday. How wonderful it was to get a package!! I opened it and it was a Strawberry Shortcake doll, the tomboyish one, Blueberry something-or-other I think. Or maybe it was a butterscotchy one. I don't remember. Anyway, I was already was envisioning her living alongside Strawberry in the shoe box she occupied. She smelled soooooo wonderful!

On our last day in Austria we took a long time to say goodbye. I cried. I was going to miss everyone so much. I STILL absolutely love the memories I have of that trip.. the old lady with the budgie birds, playing in the rain with a plastic swan, wandering in the woods looking for mushrooms, feeding wild birds that landed directly on my hand.. I love all of the memories! Except for one..

On that very last day of our visit to Austria my grandmother thought it would be a nice gesture on my part to give cousin Evelyn my Blueberry (Butterscotch?) doll. As a way to remember me. As a way to say thanks for the clothes. As a way to say it was nice to see you again. It pained my heart to hand over that delicious smelling silky haired doll. I even said no, out loud, to my grandmother. That's just not done. But I did it because I adored my little doll. She was my BIRTHDAY present for crying out loud! From my mother! Who was in another country!!

I still miss her.

A lovely day..

2010-06-30T16:00:00.000-04:00

Lately Maddie has been having a case of the jealousies when it comes to AJ. She's not been too fond these past two weeks of me paying attention to him. So today was girls day out while the boys spent time together off on their own.

Our girl day actually started last night, with Dada spending the night on the futon and Maddie and I sleeping together. I don't get to sleep much with my kids anymore since I went back to work because I work a graveyard shift, so it's always a special treat! This is the fabulous face I saw when I woke up. So peaceful and beautiful!

AJ actually wakes up about two hours before Maddie does, so I got to spend some time with him before devoting my attention to Maddie. This morning we got to spend it cleaning up the outside of the house!! Someone decided to treat my husband to a TP'ing for his birthday. All the TP got dumped around AJ and he loved it. I think it's one of his favorite things.. playing with unrolled TP and opening and closing doors of all kinds.

Before going on our date, Maddie and I had to go to the nursery to choose some fruit trees for our backyard. We settled on Mandarin oranges, apricots, and probably cherries. After that we went to Jamba juice for some smoothies, and pirate's bootie.

We had fun walking around for a bit before deciding to see a movie. Maddie's very first ever!!! I decided on Toy Story 3, since it was the only G movie playing. We were stuffed on Jamba juice and pirate's bootie so we decided not to have popcorn.

Movie time was very cute. I let Maddie choose the seat and she walked right up to the front of the theater. I was right away dizzy and cross eyed but it was my daughter's first movie and I was going to stick it out! I actually felt better after a few minutes. Maddie liked playing with the seats, getting the bottoms to go up and down and up and down. She stood on the seat and made friends with the little boys sitting behind us. For some reason she knew the lights were supposed to be off because she loudly proclaimed "Mama! The lights are on!"

Eventually the lights dimmed and the previews began. After the first one ended Maddie loudly asked "What happened??". After the next preview ended Maddie asked "What happened??" Then again and again for like 35 more previews she loudly asked after each one "What happened??" She got a few adults giggling. I don't think she liked that the "movies" were so short! Then there was this little cartoon before the movie started about night and day, and the night character had sheep jumping a fence. Maddie started loudly bleating along with them.. "Baaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!" People around us started cracking up.

Finally the movie started and Maddie snuggled up to me so sweetly! I didn't even have to ask. She just shoved the arm rest out of the way and laid across me. She only lasted about 20 minutes before getting really restless. I had to start whispering into her ear almost constantly, saying "Ooh Maddie look at the horsie!" or "Oh no Barbie is sad!" to keep her focused. About half way through the movie she told me she had to go pee pee. Off to the bathroom we went. Afterwards she saw the concession stand and found M&M's. I spent like $7 on a handful. Sheesh. I asked Maddie about 15 times if she wanted to go back into the movie, and she insisted on going home. That was okay with me. I had a wonderful time with her on our girls day out!

P.S. Happy birthday to my beloved husband!! Thank you for everything you do! I hope you enjoyed your one sleep in day a year. :)

Growing up.

2010-06-05T02:40:00.002-04:00

So the big girl bed is a big success! It was absolutely no big deal at all. When she woke up the first morning I heard a small exclamation of surprise, I assume due to the fact that there was no rail on her bed. After a little while I heard her rustling around her room a bit. Her room is next to ours and I saw her walking up and down the hallway, quiet as a mouse. She heard me move in my bed and she scurried back to her room as fast as she could. I called out to her and she burst into my room as happy as could be! It's been easy ever since.

On Thursday we all drove to Maddie's preschool and dropped off her registration papers. The receptionist told me "Oh! Maddie will be in room #X with Miss X!" And I cried. For some reason, hearing that my daughter is going to be in an actual classroom with an actual teacher just did me in. Sigh. They really do grow up much too fast.

Big Girl Bed

2010-05-27T01:18:00.002-04:00

Tonight is Maddie's first night in a big girl bed.

For the past several months, since we discovered that she can climb in and out of her crib with ease, we've been contemplating removing the front rail of her crib to turn it into a toddler bed. After all, what's the use in having it there at this point?

After bath time, I just decided tonight's the night.

I went to the garage and got an allen wrench. Maddie saw me removing the first bolt and of course had to be involved in the action. I allowed her to remove the bolt herself and pull it out. I loosened the remaining three bolts and she removed those as well. I pulled off the front rail, put on a fresh sheet, made the bed, and that was that. I told her it was now a big girl bed.

When I tuck her into bed we read a few books in her glider chair, then I stand up and rock her and sing for a bit in front of her crib. I followed the exact same routine as usual. She usually lets her lower arm hang down and grabs the front rail but tonight it wasn't there. She asked to "hold it", so for routine's sake I stood to the side of her bed and let her hang on to the side rail while we finished singing.

Then.... I laid her down. I gave her kisses and asked her if she wanted her music on. She said yes. I turned it on and started to walk out and she started to get upset! Oh no!! I went back to her right away to comfort her and she was saying "I want it off! I want it off!" and I thought she was talking about the rail. I calmly explained to her that this is how her bed was going to stay tonight, already envisioning having to bolt the front rail back on. She got a bit exasperated with me until I realized she was talking about the music. Oh. Whoops.

I turned off her music, left the door open a crack, and laid down in the hallway right outside her door to see what she would do, half expecting that I'd be camped out there a while to gently lead her back to her bed that she now had the freedom to leave easily.

As I watched, she rolled over and fell asleep.

I love her.

Fruits and Veggies

2010-05-23T08:23:00.003-04:00

I am trying to lose a few pounds. I have yet to lose any of the weight I put on while pregnant with AJ. To help me down that path I've been cooking recipes out of my "Clean Eating" cook book by Tosca Reno. LOVE it!

Most of the recipes call for tons of fruits and vegetables, some of which my dear husband has not heard of. Being the primary grocery shopper of the relationship, I received the following text message after one shopping trip:

"Next time just write "fruits and veggies: ONE OF EVERYTHING". That would make it easier on me."

Hello again!

2010-05-22T06:54:00.005-04:00

So it's been AGES since I've written anything of substance on this here bloggy blog thing. It pretty much happened that after the boy was born, I just devoted myself to spending every waking moment with my kids. Not to say that writing takes up a TON of time or something, which it doesn't, so I should be better at this, but I'm just completely exhausted by the time the kids go to bed. Two children are not twice as much work as one, they are a hundred time as much work as one. Two are also a million times more rewarding than one, with their loving each other and giggling together and playing with each other and missing each other. Nothing better than witnessing the two people you love most in the whole wide world love each other!

My kids are in good health. Maddie is talking like craaaazy. She speaks in full sentences and she takes after her father in the blabbermouth department. She's so inquisitive and always wants to know everything about everything. I love it. I love teaching her. She also, NOT like her father, loves her quiet times. Sometimes she actually asks for a nap, only to sit in her bed and quietly play with her toys or books. That she gets from me. :)

AJ's legs are almost good as gold! According to his last appointment with the orthopedic doctor, there is only about a 5 - 10 degree bend left in his knees. The hope is that once he starts walking all the time it will correct itself. Which may not be too far off, he's motoring around pretty well now! He's at the point where if he's holding something in his hand and doesn't realize he's standing on his own, he can stay there for a good 15 seconds at least! He cruises along the furniture and crawls very fast. His favorite game is to crawl toward you as fast as he can and crash into you with his head. Boys.

My most favorite activity of any kind is watching my kids play with each other. They mostly just chase each other right now, Maddie running around and AJ crawling after her, both of them laughing their goofy donkey sounding laughs. Sometimes she tickles him, sometimes they just giggle together in the car.. no matter what it is, them interacting melts my heart.

Maddie is 2 1/2 and AJ is 10 months old. She is 3'2" and 32 pounds. I forgot his length but AJ is holding steady at 22 pounds for several months already and I was actually concerned he had stopped growing haha! He's getting nice and long though and the doctor assures me that this is normal for breastfed babies.. they get nice and fat then once they start moving around they burn that all off and become healthy lean strong children. He still doesn't have any hair.. Maddie had started sprouting a lot already and now she has gorgeous curls, but he's still got nothing but fuzz.

I'm going to wrap this up before it becomes a rambling mess. I am making a promise to myself to write more. Not just for your benefit, dear reader, but so I remember every precious moment of my delicious life.

Dada can handle a sick baby!!! (or can he?)

2010-04-26T03:29:00.002-04:00

(Dada Post)
This morning when Maddie woke up she had a bad cough and was very warm. Unfortunately however my wife had to go to work tonight at 8pm leaving Dada home with a sick little girl.

My wife being the loving, caring (worried) mother that she is was texting me all evening. I told her to settle down and kept trying to convince her that her daughter was in good hands and that I was perfectly capable of taking care of my little angel that had a little cough.

Before I went to bed Bianka asked me to check on Maddie. So I did. Then she asked me if Maddie was hot. So I checked. Then she asked me to take Maddie's tempature. So I did. Well.... I tried. My wife bought one of those stupid digital forehead swiping thermometers. What happened to the good ole' days when we just stuck the thermometer up their butt!?! Just kidding!

Anyways! I kept taking her tempature with this....well.... gadget I suppose. Everytime it read between 74 and 84 degrees. So then I would test it on myself and it kept reading roughly the same. Stupid gadget!

So I gave up and just figured it was an error on the "gadgets" part. Then while I was brushing my teeth I noticed that the head of this "gadget" had a plastic cover over it to protect the sensor. Who knew? My wife didn't tell me that! How was I supposed to know? Grrrrrr. By the way those stupid "gadgets" work really well once you take the plastic sensor proctector thingy off.

So as usual I've stuck my foot in my mouth. I spent the whole evening telling my wife that our daughter was in good hands only to find out the Dada can't even take a baby's temperature correctly.

Personally, I blame it on the stupid "gadget"!!!!!

Babies Don't Keep

2010-04-16T10:22:00.001-04:00

Mother, O Mother, come shake out your cloth,
Empty the dustpan, poison the moth,
Hang out the washing, make up the bed,
Sew on a button and butter the bread.

Where is the mother whose house is so shocking?
She's up in the nursery, blissfully rocking.

Oh, I've grown as shiftless as Little Boy Blue,
Lullabye, rockabye, lullabye loo.
Dishes are waiting and bills are past due
Pat-a-cake, darling, and peek, peekaboo

The shopping's not done and there's nothing for stew
And out in the yard there's a hullabaloo
But I'm playing Kanga and this is my Roo
Look! Aren't his eyes the most wonderful hue?
Lullabye, rockaby lullabye loo.

The cleaning and scrubbing can wait till tomorrow
But children grow up as I've learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down cobwebs; Dust go to sleep!
I'm rocking my baby and babies don't keep.

- Ruth Hulbert Hamilton

Poop

2010-04-12T06:42:00.005-04:00

Imagine, if you will, that about a hundred years ago people began having great difficulties having bowel movements (BM's for short). It all came about because of some very unhealthy lifestyles. People weren’t eating correctly because they were desperately trying to be thin and beautiful. They were malnourished and took a lot of pills and other drugs to help them become and stay thin. People were so concerned with looking good that they put their health aside to get there.

As a result of this lifestyle, many people had a terrible time having BMs. Some people even died. Something had to be done to save these folks. Instead of simply changing their lifestyles back to healthy ones, people flocked to the doctors to have their problem fixed. The problem became so prevalent that people became fearful of having BMs. Everyone dreaded going to the bathroom because of all the horror stories of pain and death. This normal, natural bodily function was labeled dangerous and hazardous and needed to be monitored and controlled to save lives.

Over time, it became the ‘norm’ to go the hospital whenever someone had to have a BM so that doctors could monitor the process and intervene if they needed to. This continued through the years and is still practiced today. An onslaught of new life-saving technology and machinery was invented for us in aiding people to have a BM. It has become such a common practice to go to the hospital to have a BM that people have become uninformed on how to do it themselves. They no longer trusted their own bodies to have a BM on their own. People were so scared to have a BM that having one anywhere besides a hospital was considered irresponsible, dangerous and risky. Even though those old unhealthy lifestyles, which caused the problem in the first place, are no longer practiced, having BMs is no longer considered a normal event. Even the healthiest of people go to the hospital to have BMs out of fear that something might happen. They go ‘just in case’.

So, you realize you have to have a BM and even though you are a healthy person and having a BM is a normal, natural physiological function that your body was designed to do, you go to the hospital. You grab a bag of some personal belongings and head out the door in a hurry. During the car ride you get very tense because the cramps are coming on strong and you can’t get comfortable. You try breathing through them but this only helps a little with all the stop and go traffic and bumps in the road. Not to mention that you just wish you could be at home and have privacy. Upon arrival at the hospital, you are wheeled up to a room and instructed to put on a gown with nothing else on (it has a large opening in the back which will show you rear end if you get up and walk anywhere). You are told to lie down so that a nurse can examine you. Then the nurse comes in and explains that she is going to have to insert 2 fingers into your rectum to check the progress of your feces. You obviously feel humiliated because someone you don’t know has just touched a very private and personal part of you.

Then the nurse straps a monitor to your stomach to measure the severity of your cramps and sticks an iv in your arm. This is very distracting and makes the pain of the cramps even worse. Soon, your cramps become stronger and you are getting very uncomfortable. At this point, the nurses change shifts and new nurse comes in. She says she needs to check you again since it’s been awhile and you don’t seem to be making any progress. She inserts 2 fingers again and shakes her head from side-to-side and gives you a very disapproving look. You have not made any progress. You want to try so badly to relax so you can make progress but with the iv, the strangers, the fingers in your rectum and the negative attitudes of the staff, there are just too many distractions and you can’t let go. By now your cramps are very painful and it takes all you’ve got to just stay on top of them.

The hospital team decides to insert a wire up your anus to determine if, indeed, your cramps are as bad as you say they are. They again insert 2 fingers to check the fecal decent. They tell you that if you don’t make any progress in the next 30 minutes, they may have to cut the feces out. This causes you to be even more tense and you have a hard time trying to relax just knowing what may happen if you can’t push it out yourself. After another hour of laying in bed, the doctor comes in and does yet another exam with 2 fingers because he says he wants to be sure the nurses were doing it right. He feels it is time for you to begin to push the feces out. So you are in bed, flat on your back with your feet up in stirrups trying to have a BM and pushing with all your might while the strange nurse and a doctor intently watch your anus. The feces is not coming out fast enough so the doctor decides that your anus must not be big enough for the feces to pass through so he makes a large cut in your anus to make it bigger. They also need to use a vacuum extractor to help pull the feces out.

You finally manage (with the help of a large cut and vacuum) to push the feces out. You are in a lot of pain, you’re bleeding, exhausted, spent and humiliated. You feel like something in your body is broken and didn’t work correctly. This must be true since you needed all this help for a normally natural bodily function right? The nurse then pushes on your abdomen to make sure all of the feces has been expelled. This is VERY painful but thank goodness you were in a hospital or else something bad might have happened. Someone stitches you up and are given instructions on how to aid your healing anus.

So, you made it through. You’re alive and that’s what really matters right? Is it though? What about your pain? What about the humiliation? What about the violation of privacy? What about the anger you feel towards the whole damn thing because your experience could have been completely normal and uncomplicated if you had just stayed at home?

Now, this scenario is absolutely and utterly ridiculous right? It seems absurd to go to the hospital for something that could have easily, and much less painlessly, been done at home. The same is true of birth. This scenario is exactly what has happened to the birth process (the ‘unhealthy’ habits were obviously a bit different) and many women are suffering, needlessly, as a result. I can attest to the fact that this scenario is VERY common in hospitals today – I have even experienced it with my own hospital birth.

People in this generation have been raised to fear birth and to think that it needs the medical community to make it happen. Birth interventions have become so common that people accept them (and every side effect that comes with them) as necessary for a good outcome. And MOST don’t believe it when someone tells them that it can be so much better if those things weren’t done routinely.

A healthy, informed woman who is knowledgeable about birth has just as slim a chance of dying in birth as someone does while having a BM!! All you need to have a safe birth is to be informed and to listen to your instincts (something that is very difficult to do with people watching you – just like it is difficult to have a BM with people watching you!). Birth is safe and simple. Just like having a BM is safe and simple. Women need as much assistance while birthing children as you do while having a bowel movement!

--AUTHOR UNKNOWN--

Tricked you! This post was not about poop after all, was it? :) I am passionate about home birth, natural birth, birth without interference.. when I hear skeptics wonder why women would want to "risk" having a baby at home I have so much to say but often don't know how to put my thoughts into words. I have used the 'poop' comparison before.. saying "It's kind of like pooping.. our bodies were designed to give birth and do best when you just let it happen."

So, how would you feel if you had to go to the hospital to poop? Would you be able to focus and relax enough to let your poop come out, or would you be too tensed up, lying on your back with your legs spread eagle, your butt in full view and everyone staring at it, shoving their fingers up your anus to check the progress of your poops descent?

I had a midwife attend the birth of my first child at home. It was so amazing, so smooth, so quick, so not painful. A lot of people's first reaction is regarding the pain.. as in "You didn't use ANY drugs?" Well, no. There was no need. I was able to just wiggle the baby out with my body.

Another common concern is "Well what if something was wrong with the baby?" People! Midwives are not witches that are missing teeth and have warts. They are HIGHLY trained professionals whose SOLE JOB is birthing babies. (OB's are trained as surgeons and rarely witness a normal natural intervention free birth.) Midwives bring equipment to resuscitate babies if the need arises. They know what to do if the baby gets 'stuck'.. and that is NOT to cut the baby out.

Did you know midwives have roughly a 3% c-section rate as opposed to the current rate of 32.7% for hospitals in California??!? (SOME HOSPITALS ARE APPROACHING THE 70% C-SECTION RATE!!!) Also, both the infant and maternal mortality rates are lower with midwife assisted birth as opposed to hospital birth.

So tell me. Would you want to poop in the privacy of your own home and deliver a nice healthy alert little poopie, or go to the hospital and risk having your poopie drugged and cut out of you? :)

I recommend home birth to anyone.

P.S. Watch The Business of Being Born. It will also help you understand me.

Little Miss Independent!!!!

2010-03-30T01:10:00.006-04:00

This is a dada post.

Bianka's working tonight and I decided to put AJ to bed and have a movie night with my little girl. I was going to pop some popcorn but Maddie asked me not too.

Instead she got up off of the couch and walked into the kitchen. I knew this was going to be entertaining because she seemed so focused and determined for something. So I just leaned back against the kitchen sink and watched.

She began by opening the kitchen drawer that contains ziploc baggies and she helped herself to one. She's always needed my help to open ziploc bags but apparently not today! She opened the pantry door and walked in. She looked around for about 5-8 seconds before she spotted the enormous box of goldfish. We don't buy small boxes of goldfish. We buy the big gallon size box.

She reached up on to the shelf that's about 4 feet high, stood on her little tippy toes and grabbed the box. She then began filling up her baggie with goldfish. When I fill up the baggie I go about 1/3 of the way. I guess this measurement does not apply when she gets her own goldfish. It was almost like she was determined to see how many goldfish she could fit in the small ziploc bag.

Then being the tidy little lady that she is (she gets that from her father) she closed the box and stood back up on her tippy toes and returned the box to the same spot she got it from. Then she exited the pantry and closed the door. Never even looking up at me she walked back into the living room, crawled back up on the couch and continued watching her movie while stuffing her cheeks with goldfish. She acted like dada wasn't even there. It was like "I got dis dada!", "I don't need any help!", "I'm a big girl!"!

Can I please remind you all that she's 2!?! Not 6!!! Perhaps I need to remind HER of that!

Then when the movie was over she seemed focused again. So I sat on the couch and watched her work. She went to the DVD player and turned it off. She then reached up and turned the TV off. Then she went to the kitchen and turned the light off. Then she went to one of the two lamps in the living room and turned it off. Then she grabbed dada's hand and said "come on dada". Then we went to the second lamp and she turned that off. She pulled me upstairs to her room. I felt like I was about to get tucked into bed!

Wow!

As if this was not enough shananigans for one evening, Miss Independent continues.

She went into her bathroom while I stayed in her room. She picked up her stool from the hallway and carried it into the bathroom. I could hear her as she set it in front of the toilet. Then I hear the toilet seat open. Then after about 45 seconds of commotion I hear the faint sound of some tinkling going on. Then I hear some more random sounds before I hear the sound of toilet paper ripping. Then the toilet flushes and the toilet seat closes quietly. The lights clicks off and she returns to her room.

Upon returning to her room Miss Independent turns the overhead light off (the lamp was on) and she crawls up in her chair ready to read books before bedtime!

I'm not entirely sure she needs dada anymore. Maybe tomorrow I'll teach her how to drive. Then I won't have to drive her to the playground anymore either.

Just another memorable night with dada and Little Miss Independent! I love her!

Then and now..

2010-01-31T02:38:00.004-05:00

2 years ago I had a 2 month old baby girl. I asked everyone to wash their hands before holding her. I cringed when someone wore perfume and the noxious fumes were left on my baby's clothing. I washed every single toy and article of clothing she received before letting them touch her skin. I was absolutely mortified when my mother let her have a sip of restaurant water from a straw at 6 months old, because who knows where that ice had been!

Today.. I was nursing my 6 month old boy when the now 2 year old girl let me know that she had to go poopoo. I told her to go ahead. She danced around a little and I encouraged her a few more times to get going to the toilet. Once she got there she let me know that she didn't quite make it to the toilet and some had landed on the floor. I put the boy down on the bedroom floor (oh my!) and went to assist the girl. I poked my head back into the room to check on the boy. He had crawled himself over to my flip flop shoes and was chewing on one. I simply removed it and WIPED OFF MY SHOE.

My how far I've come.

It happened..

2009-12-18T01:23:00.002-05:00

A couple of weeks ago I was upstairs putting away laundry. Everyone else was downstairs and the following conversation ensued:

Maddie: (Hollaring up the stairs) Mama! Ah-yoo!

Me: I'm upstairs Muffin!

Maddie: (Pausing for a moment..) Mama! Ah-yoo!

Me: Muffin, I'm upstairs!

Maddie: Ah-yoo! Mama!!

Me: Maddie, I'm upstairs baby girl!

Maddie: (Pausing again......) Mama! Ah-yoo! TOO!!

Me: (Finally realizing what the heck she had been trying to tell me.) OHHH!!! Oh Muffin!! I love you too baby!! (Getting tears in my eyes. Wondering what the heck life was about before I had children. Amazed at the love I feel for these children.)

She has told me she loves me a few more times since then, and has also said it to her Dada too. They were wrestling around the other day and she stopped and looked him and told him "I la yoo Dada". I had to get a shovel and scrape his puddled remains off the floor.

In other news, AJ is talking a lot. He says Bah Bahh Bah Bah Bahhh all day long. And he sprouted his 2 bottom teeth. He is a very snuggly and smiley baby. He weighs 22+ pounds and is crawling like a champ. I think if his head weren't so gargantuan (like his Dada's), he'd probably be up and walking around already. Hahah!

We had a nice visit to Florida last week. Maddie had a wonderful time seeing our family, and having new adventures. She got to feed donkeys and pick oranges right off trees in the orange groves. I'll post pictures of that trip soon. They're on my new phone and I have to figure out how to get them to the computer. :)

Happy last minute holiday preparations!!

My sweet soul..

2009-12-04T04:14:00.002-05:00

When AJ was born Maddie wasn't all too sure what to think of him. She quietly observed him and that's about it.. unless he cried. When he cried my poor girl just bawled her eyes out. Today it's a different story. She loves him so much and it makes my heart melt. She kisses his head, she tickles him, she plays with him and she takes care of him.

I've caught her playing peek a boo with him from behind the cabinet door. John recently took video of her kneeling over him, letting her mop of blonde hair fall into his face causing him to giggle. His giggling made her giggle and pretty soon it was just this impossibly cute pile of squishy cuteness and I don't know how I contained my heart in my chest and kept it from exploding with love and pride. My children laughing together is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen in my entire life.

The other day Maddie came into our bedroom and picked up AJ's little stuffed elephant. I assumed she was just going to play with it like she sometimes does. We went downstairs to join John and AJ and I put her down and went into the kitchen. A few minutes later I turned around and AJ had the elephant in his hands and was contently snuggling his face into it. She brought it downstairs just for him, and again I melted.

Tonight, while I was at work, John was working in the garage while AJ napped and Maddie was in and out of the house visiting him while he worked. John had the monitor on in case AJ woke up. At one point he started to cry, and Maddie has taken on the responsibility of notifying us when this happens. "Dada! A-shay cowing! Help A-shay!" Since John had his hands full at that particular moment he said to her "Why don't YOU go help AJ? He's upstairs in Mama's bed." She turned around and John figured she just went back into the house to play. A few moments later he heard Maddie's sweet little voice coming over the monitor too.. John put down what he was doing and went to see what she was doing. She had climbed into our bed and was sitting next to AJ, stroking his head. He had stopped crying and she was comforting him.

I tell people that being a Mama is so amazing, it's the best thing I've ever done. I LOVE being a Mama. I love my babies so much and having kids like I do makes it ten billion times sweeter. Maddie does sweet things like this all the time.. She's a handful, don't get me wrong.. she's feisty and noisy and stubborn and smart and talkative and spirited. She wears me out! And she has big hair. But above all she's the sweetest girl I've ever known. I am so proud of my little girl. I am so proud to have her love me, to have her come running and screaming down the hallway into my open arms, knock me over, and demand that I get up so she can do it again. I never dreamed that motherhood would be so so amazing. Now I have TWO bundles of joy!! How do I keep myself from shattering with the joy of it all, keep my face from splitting in two from smiling so much?

Thank you, Maddie, for making the past two years the most precious of my whole entire life. Dada and I love you more than we can ever try to explain. You bring tears of joy to my eyes almost every day and I always have laughter in my heart with you in my life.

Holiday Gifts!

2009-11-27T14:27:00.002-05:00

For great holiday gifts, talk to John or I about our candles! They are 100% soy wax, clean burning, and HIGHLY fragrant! We hand pour, color, and package each and every one by hand! We can even customize them. Have a favorite vase? We can turn it into a candle for you!

Soy wax is 100% natural and is non-hazardous. Most candles are made from paraffin wax, which emits harmful vapors that contain carcinogens (cancer causing agents) and petroleum chemicals. Also, soy wax burns 35% - 50% longer, giving you a longer lasting clean burning candle.

We own our company and can work out any custom order for you. We can offer a bulk rate discount if you are interested.. or give you a discount just because you are our friend! :) Contact one of us and we'll chat! Happy Holidays!

2009-11-22T04:41:00.003-05:00

Dear Madeline,

You are my sweet little girl and I love you so much. Here is just a quick note on what happened today, and a list of other things:

Things you like:

Big trucks! (Peacocks)

Busses.

Trains.

Your brother.

Dancing.

Reading books.

Things you don't like:

When people sing along to songs.

Loud noises.

Recently you woke up from a nap. I got you from your room and you made me put you down so that you could clean up your toys from the floor. When we passed by my bedroom you wanted to peek inside to see if AJ was sleeping. He was not, and you asked to get his little musical elephant. When we got downstairs I went into the kitchen with Dada and started making stuff to eat. A few minutes later I turned around and AJ, who was sitting in his bouncy chair, had his elephant in his hands and was happily chewing away on it's ear. You are so thoughtful! You wanted to get it just so you could give it to your brother!

Cool Kids!

2009-11-07T19:35:00.003-05:00

Bianka is at work and left herself logged in so DaDa gets to sabotage her blog. Yay!

I just got home from running errands and now I'm hanging out around the house with my awesome kids. One of the first things I did when I walked in the door is I gave me daughter a kiss. After we kissed she said in her adorable angelic voice, "kiss owwie". I have a big wrap on my thumb from burning myself (that's a fun story too). Maddie saw the wrap on my thumb and wanted to kiss my owwie. I've been home about 40 minutes now and she's asked to kiss owwie about 4 times. DaDa's owwie feels so much better now.

Also when I got home I turned on ESPN to check out the college football highlights for the day (for all you uniformed ladies out there, ESPN is a TV channel where they have sports stuff on 24/7). My son AJ was rolling around on the floor. When football came on he would sit still and watch. In between highlights when the analyst would talk about the game AJ would roll around and squeal and get so angry. Then the highlights would come back on and he'd grin and watch football. I still haven't decided whether or not this is a good thing though. I mean I love that my 3 month old boy likes watching football but it's a bit early I think.

Well, I just wanted to share some cute stories about my very cool children. Thanks for listening!

DaDa!

AJ's legs

2009-11-03T05:02:00.006-05:00

There are two moderately graphic picture posted here. I am making them small, so click to see them larger, however if you are squeamish, please close your eyes.

So I happened to mention on Facebook that we were waiting to hear what kind of treatment we would be getting for AJ's "curly" legs. That got a lot of questions headed my way because a lot of people weren't even aware that his poor little legs were having problems. Allow me to share..

AJ was a breech baby, meaning when I was pregnant with him he was feet down instead of head down like he was supposed to be. On top of that, he was a good sized baby. I also have a wide pelvis. ("Ample", as my midwife liked to call it. Hi Sue!) My cervix likes to dilate super early. (8cm dilated by 36 weeks and no sign of contractions for at least a month). I grow babies to at least 42 weeks of pregnancy. (Possibly longer, who knows.. haven't ever spontaneously gone into labor.) All of these factors contributed to AJ being completely wedged down deep and low in my pelvis. (If I bent over too far you probably could have seen his toes hanging out. Ha!!) Which led to him not being able to stretch his legs and use them for nearly my entire pregnancy.

Soooo, when he was born, his legs were "curly". That's the best way I can describe them. From the knees down, his legs were smooshed and had no meat on them. His shin bones seemed to be really bowed. His feet turned inward, and the toes on his left feet weren't lined up, almost like some were sticking out the top of his feet and some sticking out the bottom of his feet. His feet had been curled up and under/around his butt. If you picture him sitting cross legged and then wedged into your pocket, that is how he was. Here are the pictures.

Once he was (finally) born, it was clear that there were issues with his poor little legs. Carrying him around felt like carrying a ball.. his legs never straightened. A hip assessment was done on him (because 20% breech babies have hip problems) and he wailed so loud and so hard, not because he had hip problems but because the muscles in his legs were so tightly contracted from never having been stretched out that it hurt him! It broke my heart.

We visited a pediatrician. He said to wait it out. He said "I was a breech baby and I'm just fine!" John and I took it upon ourselves to stretch his legs every time we changed his diaper, and they began to slowly improve, but not completely. For AJ's 3 month check up we visited a new doctor. (Dr. Bob Sears.. love him! The 1st pediatrician kind of rubbed me the wrong way anyway when he said home birth is BAD! and thinks people who scrutinize vaccines before making decisions are BAD!.. but that's a whole 'nother post!) Anyway, Dr. Bob recommended physical therapy for AJ's legs, since at 3 months old his knees still could not straighten. He suggested I call CHOC.

CHOC has a waiting list, so they suggested in the mean time I rule out other problems by taking AJ to an orthopedic doctor. That doctor determined there is still a 15% angle in AJ's knees that is still there. He said we do not need casts for the time being (YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!) and to go forward with the physical therapy. He wants to see us back in 3 months to check for progress and determine if other treatment is necessary. He also requested AJ get an ultrasound for his hips because of the high incidence of hip issues with breech babies. Just to rule anything out. And last but not least, he suggested we see a genetic doctor to rule out any congenital deformities. A lot of ruling out going on, but I'm a proactive type of person and would rather prevent issues and treat them now, instead of waiting to see what might be wrong later and finding out it's too late to fix.

The goal is to help his tight muscles and ligaments stretch with the physical therapy. I assume the physical therapists will assess AJ a little more when they see him. I'm hoping that the stretching is what helps fix everything for my baby boy and nothing more drastic needs to be done. Thank you all for your concern and I welcome the questions you have been asking!

Weekend carnival

2009-10-10T04:44:00.003-04:00

This may seem like a really boring entry, but it's what makes for a very happy day in my world... plus I am bragging about how awesome my daughter is at winning goldfish.

I had SUCH an awesome day today. I woke up and took baby AJ to our first day of baby and me yoga with instructor Lauren. It was so nice, as yoga always is, but it was extra special because I got to take AJ with me. He babbled through half the class, then nursed for a moment for a small snack, fell asleep, and woke up right when class was over. After that we headed home and took a nap together.

When we woke up, I strapped him to my chest and started cooking for my family. John had spaghetti left overs, but I brought out the wanna be chef in me for everyone else's dinner. My parents arrived and we had blackened salmon stuffed with corn bread stuffing, vegetables, rice with almonds, and cookies for dessert.

When dinner was done John and I quickly cleaned the kitchen (having a clean kitchen is for some reason essential to my peace of mind..), got the kids dressed, and headed off to the local church carnival. The loud rides and screaming were a bit much for Maddie so I put her ear plugs in. We played a few games and Maddie did the best of all. Seriously. I really wanted to play the win a goldfish game.. we found it and bought Maddie ten ping pong balls. She started chucking them at the bowls and landed 3 of them!! She almost made 2 more but they bounced out. If only the prize was money instead of fish! :) Perhaps on Monday we will go to the pet store to pick up the fish. They handed out fish coupons instead of actual fish. I like that idea, it's good for the fish. Keeps the people who don't really want the fish from getting them and hurting them! I typed fish a lot in this paragraph.

Maddie went on a few kiddie rides and had a lot of fun! She rode the car "roller coaster" that went in a circle, then rode the turtle that went in a circle. She had lots of fun waving at us every time she came back around.

Spending time with my family makes me happy, and today I got to spend the entire day with them. And I got to go to yoga! And I have a clean house! And I love my kids so so so much! And I got to play chef and make a tasty healthy fancy dinner! And I have an awesome husband! Ok goodnight..

Here's Maddie on the car ride:

Here is Maddie doing AWESOME at the goldfish ping pong ball game:

Here is me, my mom, AJ and Maddie. I learned the diaper as a bib for the wrap trick from my friend Lindsey. Thanks Lindsey!

My mom, Maddie, and her ear plugs:

A healthy chili recipe, my way

2009-09-29T03:32:00.004-04:00

I enjoy cooking. Over the past 2 years I have become quite good at making meals fast and creatively. Though not fancy, here is a household favorite.. "Throw and Go Chili". I will list for you the cookbook's version AND my modifications.

Throw and Go Chili (American Heart Associations healthy version)

This recipe serves 4

Ingredients:
Vegetable oil spray
12 oz. lean ground beef
1 16oz can no-salt-added dark red kidney beans, rinsed and drained
1 14.5oz can diced tomatoes with onions, celery, and bell peppers
12 oz frozen bell pepper stir-fry mix (bell peppers and onions)
1 tablespoon chili powder (I use Ancho chili powder)
1/2 tablespoon instant coffee granules (I do NOT use the coffee for goodness' sake! I don't need my 2 year old to be any more bouncy than she already is.)
1 teaspoon ground cumin
1/2 teaspoon sugar
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup fat-free or light sour cream

Step 1.) Heat a 12 inch skillet over medium-high heat. Remove from heat and lightly spray with vegetable oil spray, being careful not to spray near a gas flame. Cook beef for 3 minutes, or until browned, stirring frequently. Pour into a colander and rinse under hot water to remove excess fat. Drain well. Wipe skillet with paper towels. Return beef to skillet. Increase heat to high.

(This is how I cook step 1.): "Lightly brown meat." Saves a lot of time if you don't have much, like when a two year old is pulling on your shorts and is "cooking" on the floor at your feet and by walking around too much for the extra steps in step 1 it would cause you to trip on her and you are stirring the meat with one hand and holding a barfy two month old in your other "free" arm and trying to wipe some barf from that "free" arm before it falls into the meat and adds extra flavor.)

Step 2.) Stir in beans, tomatoes, bell peppers, chili powder, coffee granules (again, I do NOT use the coffee for Pete's sake!, in my version), cumin, and sugar. Bring to a boil over medium-high heat. Reduce heat and simmer, covered, for 30 minutes.

Step 3.) Stir in salt. Let stand for 10 minutes to absorb flavors.

Step 4.) To serve, ladle chili onto bowls. Top each serving with a dollop of sour cream.

(In the interest of saving time, this is how I combine steps 2 and 3 and 4.): Stir in remaining ingredients, except sour cream and the coffee are you crazy? Let it boil over medium heat while you set the table, taking care that baby does not barf on clean plates and toddler does not grab spoons. Get everyone seated and serve in bowls with a dollop of sour cream on top.)

Sooooo, basically my version is Brown meat, Add remaining ingredients (except the coffee for crying out loud!), Top with sour cream. Done. A delicious, nutritious, and easy dinner with only 259 calories per serving! I'd add a picture, unfortunately it's all been eaten and I didn't think of it while it was cooking.

Big

2009-09-21T04:30:00.002-04:00

I may have the barfiest baby ever. I don't know how he's growing. He barfs up so much milk I swear he's producing his own in his belly because he barfs up twice as much as I've given him. In spite of all this barfing, he is growing at a ridiculous rate. He's over 16 pounds already, and an absolute pork chop. A beef cake. There's rolls on his thighs and rolls on his arms and rolls on his toes. Did I mention the rolls on his thighs? Ya, this kid is big. Have you every seen the Michelin Man? Imagine if I had married him instead of John and had a baby. (I'm exaggerating, but only slightly.)

My thoughts right now are about when my kids get older. Maddie is not even 2 years old yet, but she is taller than most of the 3 year olds and even a 4 year old once in a while when we go to the park. Big boys don't have much of a problem when they hit school age, but big girls are different.

Is she going to be made fun of when she gets older for being different than her classmates? I do think her personality will help her get far. A few weeks ago we were at a beach party and Maddie approached a little girl who was collecting shells. This girl, who was much older than Maddie but the same size did not like that a "baby" was playing with her. Understandable because Maddie reached her hand right into this little girls bucket and pulled out a handful of treasures. Also, last week at the party I mentioned in my previous post, Maddie walked up to a little girl (again the same size but older), grabbed the girls arm and said Hi! Hi! Hi! The girl was slightly taken aback and shied away. Anyhow I think Maddie will be able to make friends.

Are people (children and adults alike) going to have expectations of her that they would have of an older child because they mistake her for someone who is older? Will she be denied the kids meal because she looks older than she really is? Ha ha I jest..

I hope this post makes sense, because my husband is being his usual motor mouth self and I am having trouble proof reading it. Maddie talks a lot too, and not only does AJ have lots of barf coming out of his mouth but he also has lots of babble coming out of his mouth. My children not only inherited their father's size but also his diarrhea of the mouth. I can only imagine my sanity in a few years when all 3 of them are trying to get a word in... :) Ha!

P.S. My husband really is totally amazing and I hope he teaches our son to be as good as him if not better, and teaches our daughter to expect no less from the person she marries.

Keepin' it real

2009-09-13T01:41:00.005-04:00

Earlier this afternoon I was getting ready for a party. I put on my party dress, and it was snug. I haven't bought any new clothes recently because I am hoping to be able to fit into my clothing that I wore before I became pregnant with AJ. So I put on an old dress and I stood in front of the mirror and I didn't like what I saw.

I looked at how my abdomen pooched out beneath the waistband. I grabbed a hold of a full handful of flesh. I looked at how my once trim arms look bigger. I looked at my face and thought of how it looks fuller now. I stood there and I quietly critiqued myself.

As I was doing this Maddie was standing at my feet. She was playing with my skirt and she said something quietly. She said it again, then again, and then I finally heard her.

She said "Mama. Pretty."

Makes you realize you're beautiful just the way you are, especially in the eyes of those that love you the most.

If only you knew how important it is to hear those words, my baby girl. I love you so much and you make me feel like the most beautiful Mama in all the universe. I love you to pieces!!!!!

Ages!

2009-09-11T18:50:00.004-04:00

It's been AGES since I have posted anything.. I skipped the entire month of August, actually. I'd use the excuse of having a new baby in the house but plenty of others write with a new baby in the house. I'll just say that I'm devoting all of my attention to my family. :) Which is true!

Maddie is 22 months old now and AJ is 7 weeks old, and an absolute TANK. He is enormous. I'm moving him up to his size 6 months clothes pretty soon here. He's almost 15 pounds. I wonder if he's going to be bigger than his 6'7" father by the time he's 15 years old. It's crazy that my milk can sustain a child that is growing so fast, nearly a pound a week since he's been born. Aren't our bodies amazing?

I'm going to try to get back into writing mode. I felt for a while that writing about my day to day life was getting boring for you to read, which for some I am sure it was (ahem I know who you are), but I am being asked by others to please post something! So back to posting I go. Day to day life is usually the best fuel for the funny stuff anyway, and funny is what I like to be. And OH BOY are my kids funny!!

I'll tell you all about the symphony of sounds that come from AJ's rear end almost constantly, the way the baby belly isn't for some reason just melting off like it did after I had my first baby, and Maddie's recent adoption of the words NO! and MINE! Hilarious, I tell you!

Of course, my blog wouldn't be complete without pictures of my adorable children and husband, and my ramblings of how thankful I am for them. They are amazing people and I'm so fortunate to have them all in my life. Stay tuned!!

He's here!

2009-07-23T01:57:00.005-04:00

Well, baby finally arrived!

AJ was born on Friday. He was 8lbs 11oz. He measured 19.5 inches, but we're not sure how accurate that is.. he had badly contracted legs due to his breech position. We can't straighten his legs, although John has been working with him lots and has made great improvements!

Obviously, the way things turned out was not how I envisioned this birth. I had such an awesome experience with Maddie's home birth, and the plan all along was to have this little boy at home too. Things didn't work out that way.. AJ was breech, I never went into labor, I was fully dilated for weeks.. in the end a c-section is what happened.

To be honest, c-section SUCKS. I would choose home birth, or at least vaginal birth, ANY day over a c-section for a hundred different reasons. I took an hour to mourn, though, how things went. And then I moved on and was grateful for how things turned out. I have a beautiful, healthy, brand new baby boy, and THAT is what is most important of all!!

Maddie is a little cautious of her new little brother, especially when he cries. She gets worried and calls for me when he cries. She's quite generous with the kisses though, and she loves to pet his soft head!

P.S. Happy 3 year anniversary to the most amazing man in the entire world. I would not be who I am today if you hadn't come into my life. I love you so much, my husband.

A toddler funny

2009-07-14T01:28:00.002-04:00

So John sits on the toilet and Maddie follows him into the bathroom. She says... "Dada Beans!"

I start rolling on the floor with laughter because she's referring to his man parts. "Dada Beans! Dada Beans!" she says.

After a few minutes I realized she was trying to say "Dada Penis". Ahh aren't babies cute??

Bianka's Big Bad Baby Bump

2009-07-13T00:37:00.004-04:00

You wanted baby belly, baby belly is what you're gonna get!

No excuses, no embarrassment. 41 weeks, 3 days pregnant. (And counting.)

Enjoy the picture!

Summer time!

2009-07-12T01:04:00.003-04:00

Since I'm so busy trying to keep my contractions going, I'm just going to post a few cute pictures of Madeline. They're mostly from 4th of July weekend and from swimming at my parents house.

On 4th of July John took Maddie to the downtown Huntington Beach celebration on his bicycle. She sported her shades. They had a lovely time watching the parade!

Maddie has been getting more confident in her swimming abilities. John bought her a swim vest with removable layers.. the better she gets at swimming, the more layers you remove!

Regarding my labor... well, I've been fully (10cm) dilated for at least a month now. Baby is already +2 station. I have no cervix left, essentially. I just don't go into labor. I've been having contractions, but they don't get any closer than 6 minutes apart before stopping completely. I guess I just have a comfortable uterus and babies don't like to come out!

Anyway, enough with the personal details. Here are some adorable Maddie pictures!

Swimming

2009-06-28T00:59:00.005-04:00

Maddie took swimming lessons a year ago, last June 2008. She couldn't even walk yet! This summer we are spending a lot of time in my parents pool. (We'd be in it even more than we already are if they'd just keep it heated!! Brr!) I think she has forgotten everything she learned.

Maddie is quite excited about the water. Almost recklessly so. If we don't keep a constant eye on her she'll sink to the bottom, because she jumps off the edge without hesitation. We have tried teaching her to at least count to three first, but she gets to "Oonnneeee..." and in she goes! No patience, that kid. I wonder where she got that from. :)

She'll be in swimming lessons again the first session available after this baby gets here.

Can you find Maddie in the 3rd picture down? :)

Speaking of language..

2009-06-19T22:22:00.003-04:00

Maddie has said what SOUNDS like the F-word a couple of times. We weren't sure, but it really did sound like it. She said it when we were riding in the car yesterday and it sounded like she said "F--- Me!" John figured out the pattern.. She would say it when he would slam on the brakes.

Guess who's in trouble now?!?!? And the answer is not Maddie.

Language

2009-06-01T06:41:00.004-04:00

I find it fascinating how babies develop their language skills. Really, how they develop, period. And turn into functioning humans. I mean, how do you really TEACH such concepts as colors and numbers and math? It amazes me. Anyway, back to language. Here is what happened over the past few days that makes me just shake my head in wonder..

Maddie is talking. The other day she was spending the afternoon with my sister. She was playing with 2 plastic bead necklaces and they became tangled. Maddie started shaking them and swinging them around, trying to get them apart. She started to get a little frustrated and my sister, not knowing what the problem was, asked Maddie what was wrong. Maddie held out the necklaces to her and said "open?" The part I find neat is that although she didn't have the words for "please separate these two necklaces for me", she used the word she knew was the closest to what she wanted to get across. Open!

Then today as we were eating dinner, I placed Maddie's plate of chicken and peas in front of her. She pointed towards the kitchen and started saying "hook? hook? hook?" I didn't understand what she meant and told her so. She looked at me and said "Poon? Hook?" I understood then she was saying Fork! She clarified that for me by telling me the related tool, a spoon!

Isn't it just neat the way a baby's brain works??? I certainly think so. :) Tell me some of your own smart baby learning to talk stories!

Belly Picture!!

2009-05-26T05:59:00.005-04:00

This is for Jen, since she asked so nicely for a belly picture. :)

A pregnant belly makes an excellent toddler shelf.

Check out those cankles!!!!! They're getting really bad now.. just like they did about a month before Maddie was born. That means baby #2 is almost here!

Mmm Pizza..

2009-05-22T12:44:00.003-04:00

Someone takes after her parents..

And yes.. she ate nearly the entire piece herself.

Why I love my husband..

2009-05-16T08:43:00.003-04:00

Last night at.. oh, about 3am.. I reminded my husband that the lawn mower guys were coming in the morning and there was still a big rubber swimming pool and a pile of dog poop from my sisters dog lying in the yard. I reminded him that he promised to take care of it. He said he would do it before the lawn mower guys got there. I utilized my best whiney voice and reminded him that I would toss and turn and wouldn't get a wink of sleep until it was taken care of. He said that the only way he would do it would be naked, since he was already in bed, naked.

Fine, I said.

So out of the bed and into the yard he went, naked. And moved our picnic table and pool and picked up pooh and toys and what-nots.

And then a neighbors window slammed shut. Hehe!

Angels

2009-04-23T02:18:00.002-04:00

Husband: "I told you she was an angel!"

Because how else would she be able to fly?!?

An embarassing question..

2009-04-14T00:15:00.003-04:00

I'm sitting here wondering if this is one of those "things your mother never told you about being pregnant" or if I just have a problem.

Does being pregnant with a boy make you stinkier?? I mean stinky. Because I smelled like flowers before. All the time.

Because I swear I am just so stinky lately. My feet, my armpits.. Is it because I have little boy hormones coursing through my veins that I smell like a man?

Names!

2009-04-13T09:09:00.002-04:00

I've already asked the Facebook community for help and we received lots of suggestions, a few of which we have put onto our baby name list. Now I turn to you, my blog community.

Please help us! We don't know what to name our child. Please offer some suggestions. The only thing we ask are that the names not end in the letter or sound of S.. because our last name starts with S. If our last name were.. say.. Smith, Bruce Smith would sound like Brew Smith and I don't like that so much. Oh ya, and this baby is a boy.

Thank you for any help you can offer!!

Happy Birthday!

2009-04-01T04:02:00.004-04:00

I'd like to post some pictures from my dad's birthday party, which was this past Saturday. My mom left it up to my sister and I to plan. Typically, planning means choosing a restaurant to have dinner at. I had a sneaky little idea up my sleeve this time though.. Where could we go so that we ALL could have fun, Maddie included? Why, Chuck E. Cheese's of course!

I thought how nice it would be to be somewhere that Maddie wasn't the only squealing child. Plus my dad absolutely adores her and I thought that he would have a wonderful time watching her play and have a good time too.

What a lovely idea, yes? So we went to Chuck E. Cheese's for my dad's birthday. Maddie was a little overwhelmed by all the noise and people, but she had fun playing in the "toddler corner" where the games and rides were more her size and speed.

I hope you had a wonderful time, Papa! We love you!

5 years..

2009-03-16T19:22:00.004-04:00

Five years ago, in March 2004, I went on an awesome trip with my sister. It was a Mississippi River cruise on the famous steamboat called The Mississippi Queen. We were by far two of the 5 only young people on the boat, and by young I mean under 50, aside from the crew. It was an exciting, educational, and fun trip. We saw civil war battle fields and gorgeous historic antebellum homes.

One night the boat docked early in a little town called Natchez, Mississippi, the oldest town on the Mississippi River. After the dinner service the crew invited my sister and I out for a night on the town.. which consisted of visiting a little rinky-dink 200 year old tavern former brothel on the shore of the river called Under The Hill Saloon. It was the night before St. Patrick's day and the drinks were flowing. (Mind you, as a rare drinker, it only took one or two beverages for me to become 'tipsy'.)

I was standing at the bar looking at the bartender, thinking what freakishly large sausage looking fingers he had (could have just been my blurred vision), when this very tall good looking blond guy came up to me, grabbed my right hand, and kissed it. My stomach did a little flip flop at the romantic gesture. I had been noticing this guy during my trip so far mostly because of how tall he was (which I later found out was 6'7"). He was part of the wait staff on the boat. We spent the rest of the evening hanging out and talking and laughing.

For the next 3 nights of my trip, after the dinner service, he and I would sneak off together and talk for hours.. I say sneak because this was a five star cruise and the staff was strictly told to not fraternize with the guests. On the last night of the trip we kissed. I was head over heels. This guy was everything I had been looking for in a guy.. funny, witty, romantic, thoughtful.. I could go on and on but I fear I'm already boring you. :) We exchanged phone numbers and returned home to our respective ends of the country. Me to California, he to Florida.

We spent the next few weeks on the phone almost constantly.. literally hours at a time. After a month he moved to California. After 6 months we got engaged. In July 2006 we got married. We had a baby, created another one that's currently on the way.. and I'm the happiest woman alive.

So in a nut shell.. I guess I basically met my husband while drunk at a bar! I love him and my daughter and upcoming son more than life itself. Happy Anniversary, my sweet husband!

Temptation..

2009-03-01T00:25:00.001-05:00

You know those Pillsbury Crescent Rolls? I could eat a whole can of them. 8 servings.. but I could eat a whole can. No, really... I could. I've done it before. I will do it again.

Blessings!

2009-02-20T02:54:00.002-05:00

A text conversation between John and I after a dinner of meat loaf and mashed potatoes, where Maddie dug in with her own fingers and fed her Dada because she thought he needed to eat more. After dinner and before I could wipe off her fingers, she scooted off towards his laptop.

JOHN: Am I supposed to get upset when I have to clean mashed potatoes off my laptop for 15 minutes? Cause it only seems to make me smile. Weird huh? :)

ME: Hahaha no.. not weird at all. I smile when I have to sweep cracker crumbs out of our bed. It means we are blessed. :)

How truly blessed we are indeed!

A personal problem.

2009-02-17T02:44:00.002-05:00

I have a problem. After Maddie was born I wrote about the issue of.. uh.. dribbling. You know, peeing when I sneeze and what not. I was told that Kegel exercises would help the problem if not eliminate it completely.

At this point I feel like I could practically bench press 300lbs with my womanly parts. And yet I still pee. It only seems to be getting worse now that the baby in my belly is getting bigger. I have to cross my legs when I sneeze and (I am embarrassed to admit this) I have to hold myself like a little kid when I run to the bathroom with an extra full bladder. Today I was walking around the kitchen and coughed a couple of times and it was so bad that I actually had to go change my pants and underwear. Seriously??

Why is this happening? Am I doing Kegel's wrong? Did something important really break when I gave birth to Maddie? Am I destined for Depends?

It's a...

2009-02-10T22:38:00.003-05:00

BOY!

John had a strong hunch that it was a boy.. I had only a slight hunch, due to the mild acne I was getting.

Now I get to look foward to junior putting frogs in Maddie's lunch and other boy adventures. Hehe!

What an exciting time!

A game!

2009-02-06T22:48:00.004-05:00

The game is called PREDICT THE GENDER OF OUR BABY!

I had a girl the first time around. According to the Chinese Gender Calendar this one SHOULD be a girl too. It correctly predicted Maddie's gender, and if my math is correct then it was right about mine and my sister's genders too. You look at the mother's age at the time of the baby's CONCEPTION (not birth), and then the month the baby was born. Was it right for you or your baby?

Everyone says that if the second pregnancy is different than the first pregnancy, then the baby is of the opposite sex. There have been differences in this pregnancy, but not really very significant differences. Are they enough to mean that I am having a boy this time around?

The first time around I was nauseous almost constantly for two months straight. This time around I wasn't constantly nauseous, but when I was it was severely so I vomited a few times. The first time around my hair got super thick and nary a hair fell out until months after I gave birth. This time around it doesn't seem anything has changed for my hair.. I get a few strays in my brush and it's not really getting any thicker. Could it be because I am carrying a boy or could it be because I only gave birth to my last baby 15 months ago.. The first time around I had lovely clear skin. This time around I had mild, very mild, acne on my chin. Although perhaps I just don't remember acne the first time around.

John and I have thoughts about what we might be having this time around. We will find out on Tuesday evening!! In the mean time, what's your guess? Take the poll to the right! I'll reveal what our guess is and what the baby actually is that night. How exciting!!

A nice day at the park..

2009-02-04T02:08:00.004-05:00

Today Maddie and I spent the afternoon at the park. When we first got there Maddie hitched a ride in the stroller to the Shipley Nature Center. At one point their trails become mulch and the stroller wasn't going to handle the terrain too well, so I carried Maddie for a while. When we got back to the stroller I put her down on the boardwalk and she collected leaves and sticks. I decided to let her walk on her own for a while (while keeping my eyes open for coyotes). She skinned a knee, collected some more sticks, played with ants, scattered sand, sniffed shrubs and bushes (at this point any vegetation is worthy of a sniff that is usually reserved for flowers), and got dirty. Half way through we stopped for a snack of a banana and Cheerios. Afterwards she decided to make the hike back to the car all on her own! I'd say it was a pretty successful outing!

Collecting leaves and sticks on the boardwalk:

Walking down the path, holding onto a stick:

Checking out the mulch and leaves:

Hiking back to the car all by herself:

The bag of cheerios:

Why is it..

2009-01-29T17:14:00.003-05:00

Why is it that children and pets don't give a darn about Mama being in the bathroom until she actually closes the door? Then it's nothing but paws reaching underneath, little hands turning the knob, and smacks and shrieks from the other side.

After what must seem like an eternity to the little things but in reality is more like 10 seconds, Mama opens the door much to every one's relief. They all clamber into the bathroom, look around for a moment or two, then leave.

Popping. (Not pooping.)

2009-01-18T08:51:00.004-05:00

I became 16 weeks pregnant on Friday. I just looked at some old pictures of me at 23 weeks pregnant with Maddie and realized I am already nearly the same size I was at that time! It's no joke that you "pop" much sooner the second time around.

I think I need to start posting some belly pictures again. :)

Twist and Shout!

2009-01-10T03:06:00.002-05:00

I can feel Lima Bean moving! I have been for about a week now, but for the first couple of days I wasn't so sure. Now I keep feeling the same thing over and over again so I know it's the baby! Hehehe it's so fun! And reassuring too.

The movement still feels pretty disorganized and jumpy.. like a kernel of popcorn popping around in there. OR like a JUMPING BEAN!

DEJA VU!!!

2009-01-02T14:37:00.000-05:00

Another post by my husband:
------------------------------

Here we go again!

It's been a year and a half since I've had to deal with this in my life. I pretty much completely forgot about this.

PRENANCY CRAVINGS!

And Bianka has to be an extreme case. Everyday it seems to be some other absurd craving. Two weeks ago I had to leave my sleeping child with a friend in the middle of the night to bring her juice at work. That's right! Just juice.

I was on my way to hang out with a friend last week and I was almost to his house when she made me turn around, go to El Pollo Loco, and bring her a couple of chicken wraps with cilantro sauce. Sheesh!

Two or three days ago, it was even worse. Insanity I tell ya! She wanted a turkey sanwich with carrot slices on it. Truly amazing! I was speechless.

And now tonight, she's craving Olive Garden salad. Nothing too crazy about that except my life is in jeopardy until she gets it. As I told her earlier, I have too much to live fore to lose my life over a salad. I've already done my research to find that the nearest Olive Garden is 2.21 miles from our home and they open at 10am. I'll be there at 9:55!

Booties.

2008-12-30T07:44:00.004-05:00

Monday, December 29th, 2008. The first day since Maddie was born that she didn't nurse at all. Not once. Sigh.

She hasn't nursed much anyway for about the last 2 months. Maybe once or twice a day. Especially the past month.. I don't think any milk is coming out anymore. But in the past couple of weeks she hasn't been interested much at all except for her wake up nursing.. and yesterday morning I passed out cold after work (I get off at 6am) and John said I didn't wake up when they came into the room. So he let me sleep.

So I think she's pretty much weaned herself for the most part.. which is the way I wanted it to be. I didn't want to suddenly deny her booties. I left it up to her and it worked out wonderfully!

Oh ya, and just so I remember, December 16th was the first day she took more than 2 steps before plopping down on her bottom. She walked/shuffled about four feet from a chair to the couch. Yay baby!

An updated update

2008-12-29T15:00:00.000-05:00

I am realizing now that I never posted an update to my update.

I have stopped spotting. I was released from bed rest on Sunday. Thank GOODNESS. I was not doing well on bed rest and must admit I didn't exactly stay in bed, but John made sure I didn't lift a thing or have to do much moving. I just couldn't stand laying there.

So anyway, I'm released from bed rest and I'm all HOORAY! except that my throat is still a little scratchy, had been since Saturday. I am hoping it will go away, that maybe laying in bed surrounded by tattoo crumbs (cracker crumbs. Maddie calls crackers "tattoos".) and Cheerios is the problem.

By Sunday night I am full on sick. Sore throat, headache, runny nose, exhausted. Sooooo BACK TO BED I WENT. Ugh.

After sleeping four about 48 hours straight I finally felt a little better. I now have that nasty green left over snot. You know what I'm talking about. I went through an entire box of tissue in two days.

By Tuesday I was finally well enough to walk around the house and realize what an absolute mess it was. You see, John and I were hosting Christmas at our house. Aunts, uncles, cousins, grandparents, parents, siblings... all were coming over on Christmas day. So John and I spent the day sitting on our couch admiring our new rug while Maddie played with her toys. It was a very productive day.

On Wednesday, Christmas Eve, we admired our rug a little bit more and then went to my grandmother's house. We had a delicious dinner. Maddie reached over and helped herself to the mashed potatoes on her aunt's plate, so I just gave her a heaping spoonful all to herself.

Afterwards my parents came over to our house to see our new rug and end tables and bigcomfychair. After they left and Maddie was tucked into bed, John gave me my Christmas gift. I got a Crock-Pot!!!! I was truly excited about it. I used it the very next day for all of my Christmas guests and made mulled wine.

Christmas Day we woke up and it was raining. Since I was just getting over my cold and Maddie had been sneezing and coughing a little, we decided we were not going to go to church. We admired our rug some more and finally decided we had better clean up the house. I started prepping food and got the mulled wine going. When the rain slowed down a bit we left for my parents house and opened a few gifts,

and I managed to talk my mom and sister into coming over to our house to help us finish cleaning up. They did an excellent job!! With only an hour to clean my disastrous mess of Christmas decoration boxes and baby toys and just STUFF, they made quick work of things and the house was ready just in time for the first person to arrive!

We had a really nice time. Maddie took a nap shortly after people started to arrive. When she woke up she had a nice poopy diaper for my sister to change (Karin's very first poopy diaper ever! Congratulations!), and my sister brought her downstairs in her beautiful new Christmas dress. We opened presents, enjoyed each other's company, and Maddie stole a candy cane off the tree and managed to break it open and eat it!

We all had a wonderful Christmas and hope that you did too!

Pictures!

2008-12-19T16:07:00.005-05:00

Here are some cheerful pictures of my beautiful daughter!

My little daredevil, climbing the "wave" at the Tampa airport. Paula Abdul was on our flight and John was head over heels. "Let me hold Maddie. Maybe she'll look at me!" Gag me with a spoon.

Reached the summit! How to get down? Flatten onto belly and slide down feet first of course!

What a kissy little face!

Laughing at the funny sounds her Omi is making in the front seat.

Cracking up at Omi!
Visiting Omi at work. Looks like someone had a piece of a chocolate covered graham cracker!

Opa and Omi, also known as Papa and Ohwie, with Maddie on Omi's desk.

On the swings at the park.
Watching ducks swim on the lake. It was a very cold day!
The pretty view at the park.

An update

2008-12-19T15:23:00.002-05:00

The bleeding has decreased to spotting. The same spotting which I have been having since nearly day one.

Apparently what I have is called a Subchorionic Bleed. Here is the definition: Also called subchorionic hematoma, subchorionic bleeding is the accumulation of blood within the folds of the chorion (the outer fetal membrane, next to the placenta) or within the layers of the placenta itself. These bleeds, or clots, can cause the placenta to separate from the uterine wall if they get too large, if they develop in a bad spot, or if they aren’t eventually reabsorbed.

Because subchorionic hematomas have been linked to increased risk of placental abruption and preterm labor, you don’t want to ignore signs of spotting or bleeding.

Depending on the findings of your practitioner, as well as on your practitioner’s preferences, he or she may put you on strict bed rest, insist you refrain from lifting heavy objects, and avoid exercise and intercourse. (More details here.)

SOOOooooo here I am.. in bed. On bed rest. Do you know how UNrestful and aggravating bed rest is? I sit here and think about all the things I COULD be doing. Like laundry. Dishes. ANYTHING but sitting here checking my email for new letters and cleaning Cheerios out of the bed. (Maddie spilled her snack the other day.) I guess the point is to avoid moving too much. The midwife explained that these things are sort of able to heal themselves, and that is what we are trying to achieve here. When I have a couple of days of no spotting I can go back to normal activity. By moving and bending and lifting, what I am essentially doing is ripping a scab off a wound and not allowing this bleed to heal. So heal darn it!!

In the mean time, please feel free to send me email. Maybe with some fun suggestions for bed rest activities! I'm checking my in box like every 30 seconds. :)

And so I wait..

2008-12-17T22:00:00.003-05:00

I am eleven weeks and five days pregnant.

John and I decided long ago that we wanted to have our children close together in age. We decided that October was going to be the first month we try again. I got the rosy cheeks again and decided to buy a pregnancy test. I took it about 5 days before I was due for my period and it was negative. I took it again the day before my period was due (so I'm impatient!) and it was positive!

The next day I started spotting. Nothing big.. just some super duper really light spotting. Totally normal thing to happen. It has pretty much been going on constantly since then. Isn't one of the perks of pregnancy not having to worry about staining underwear?

I researched and found a midwife out here in California that I wanted to work with, but before I found her I went to my old family doctor about the spotting. He ordered blood tests to make sure hormone levels were rising appropriately, and they were. At my 3rd appointment he was still pretty concerned about the whole spotting thing, so he sent me to get an ultrasound that afternoon. Up on the monitor I saw a tiny little bean shaped baby (who my sister has named Lima) with a quick little heart beat. I became slightly more comfortable about everything.

The thing is, every once in a while the spotting gets a little redder. Also, this past weekend we were in Florida and I got really sick one day. At first I thought it was morning sickness but for 3 hours straight I couldn't even keep down dry toast and water. Anyway, after all that puking my spotting was a little heavier again.

This morning when I woke up, before I actually got out of bed, I had a brief cramp that felt like the beginning of a menstrual cramp. Only one. I dismissed it as ligament pain. I ran a few errands with my mother, came home, and took a nap.

I had the strangest dream during my nap. There was something about a very deep lake, and how at it's deepest point there was a hole that was 5 inches across. Down that hole you could see the center of the earth and lava. I don't know what that had to do with anything, but the next thing I remember is that I was laying on my back and I pushed out a baby. It was grayish brown colored, and it's lungs were outside of it's body. It's lungs were small and a bit shriveled, and they were not moving. I started to get concerned, but then I realized that the baby was still attached to me by our umbilical cord, so I made sure to take nice deep breaths so the baby would get it's oxygen.

When I woke up from my nap and rolled over, I noticed my underwear felt a little wet. I went to the restroom and my undies were bloody.

I called my midwife and told her what was happening. Based on everything I told her, she does not believe I am having a miscarriage at this time. If I get cramps that come at regular intervals and I get actual labor symptoms, then I should be concerned. If I start to bleed heavily then I should go to the hospital.

And so I wait..

Maddie's 1yr old appointment

2008-12-09T02:37:00.003-05:00

Maddie had her one year old appointment with the pediatrician. She was due for her one year old shots. As usual, I wussed out of witnessing that part.

Maddie weighs 22lbs (50th percentile) and is 31 inches tall (95th percentile). Big shocker there.. have you seen how tall her father is? 6'7" for those of you that haven't.

The doctor said Maddie is one of the most tolerant, easy-going one year olds she has ever worked with! Maddie allowed her to peer into her ears, look into her eyes, and check her joints and parts without any protest.

She ALSO said (here is the part where I totally start bragging!!) that Maddie is exceptionally advanced vocabulary wise. Like there was any surprise there either, this child has been talking and singing since she sprung forth from my loins. But seriously, Dr. K was doing some routine tests and she pointed to a mural on the wall to see if Maddie would look in the direction she was pointing. Not only did Maddie whip her head around, but she also saw that the mural was of dalmatian puppies and she declared "Doddies!" The doctor said that the average 1 year old knows just a handful of words like Mama, Dada, and the like, but Maddie is up in the 30 - 40 word range at this point. She asks for things by name rather than by pointing, even for things that are out of sight. She asks for specific books and for specific foods, like apples (appoos) and raisins (woozies). She also says a few words that I haven't figured out the meaning to yet. She repeats them to me but I just don't know what she means. I hope she doesn't get too frustrated with me. :)

For some reason it took her a long time to figure out Mama/Mommy. She would say it when prompted before, but she only recently figured out that it's what I am called. I think that might have to do with the fact that I am always with her, so there isn't much need to call for me. Anyway, she recently started hollering "MommYY! MommYY! MommYY! MommYY!" for the majority of the day. Cute for the time being but I am told I will soon petition to change my name.

Oh! And she also recognizes the letter "O". In her ABC book and on the fridge magnets, she picks out the O and makes her mouth into a cute little shape and says "Ohh".

Speaking of fridge magnets, we have one that is a cat. Maddie picks it off the fridge, hands it to me to stick back on the fridge, she says "Cat! (Dat) Awwww..." and gives the fridge a hug.

Speaking of cats, I have a cat who is about 10 years old now. He is a special kitty. He has never liked company, first of all. He hides and many people, even close family members, have never seen this cat and don't believe he exists. It's like a Bigfoot sighting if you manage to get a glimpse of him. Even with the people that he does know he is super picky about when he allows you to grace yourself with a touch of his fur. Anyway, this cat for some reason let's Maddie totally crawl all over him! He lays flat and lets her smoosh him and dig into his fur and poke his tail and kiss his head. It's so strange but it's so touching!

Sorry for bragging so much. I'm a Mama and I'm so proud of my baby girl! I'm sure the rest of you Mama's understand!! Besides, I am sure soon enough I will be writing about all the crazy hi jinx our family experiences!

2008-12-01T22:54:00.005-05:00

OH MY WORD!! I just logged onto my blog and apparently my husband has hijacked it!! Here is what I found. Excuse me while I go crack up some more. My husband is such a dork!!
***********************

This is my beautiful daughter, Maddie! She's a quick learner, except she hasn't figured out the concept of napkin yet.

This is my incredibly hard working husband. He's vacuuming up cheerios while taking care of Maddie (very impressive). Without him in my life I don't know what I would do. He's my rock!!!! (and very sexy too)

********************

See? Big dork. You know what he said earlier tonight? We were discussing Christmas lights and how pretty I think they are. I said I wished Christmas lights could stay up all year long. Husband says: "I don't see why we don't leave them up! They SHOULD stay up! After all, you don't only put up rain gutters when it rains, right?" That's my red-neck husband for you.

Slow night survey

2008-12-01T05:40:00.002-05:00

It's a slow night at work.. and it's been a while since I posted something. I still have Maddie's birthday party pictures to post, Thanksgiving pictures to post.. ugh I'm so behind! So anyway, since I am at work and unable to upload pictures, here is a survey I stole from my friend's blog.

Here is the new 2008 edition of getting to know your family and friends.
1. What is your occupation right now? Mama and 911 operator.
2. What color are your socks right now? Black
3. What are you listening to right now? Co-workers chatting, static in my earpiece.
4. What was the last thing that you ate? Wheat tortilla with turkey and avocado.
5. Can you drive a stick shift? Not well, but I can get from here to there in an emergency.
6. Last person you spoke to on the phone? Husband.
7. Do you like the person who sent this to you? I stole it, but I like the person I stole it from!
8. How old are you today? 32
9.What is your favorite sport to watch on TV? Curling.
10. What is your favorite drink? Water. Cherry 7-Up on special occasions.
11. Have you ever dyed your hair? A few times.. but not in several years.
12. Favorite food? Carbs.
13. What is the last movie you watched? Four Christmases
14.What is your favorite day of the year? Halloween and Christmas.
15. How do you vent anger? Cry and be mean.
16. What was your favorite toy as a child? Books.
17. What is your favorite season? Spring!
18. Cherries or Blueberries? Blueberries
19. Do you want your friends to e-mail you back? Of course.
20. Who is the most likely to respond? Hmm.. I dunno.
21. Who is least likely to respond? Hmm.. I dunno.
22. When was the last time you cried? Tuesday when I saw how our family pictures turned out. They are absolutely beautiful!!!
23. What is on the floor of your closet? Spilled shoes. A box of maternity clothes. Occasionally a baby.
24. Where is 24? It is missing.
25. Who is the friend you have had the longest that you are sending this to? It is available for everyone to see.
26. What did you do last night? Worked.
27. What are you most afraid of? Losing my daughter.
28. Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburgers? Regular ol' burger.
29. Favorite dog breed? German Shepherds and Dobermans.
30. Favorite day of the week? Wednesday. No work, family is home!
31. How many states have you lived in? Two, CA and FL
32. Diamonds or pearls? Diamonds
33. What is your favorite flower? Aster Daisies.

First pigtails!

2008-11-24T19:57:00.003-05:00

Maddie's hair often looks messy. She has her mother's perpetually frizzy hair I think. Though with some water and a comb she cleans up nicely!

Here is a picture of her first pigtails. Doesn't she look adorable??

Happy Birthday, Madeline!

2008-11-15T00:03:00.009-05:00

My beautiful baby girl,

You turned one year old today. It has been the best year of my life. You are sweet, cuddly, charming, talkative, giggly, generous, intelligent, and happy. Your Dada and I have so much fun with you!

You have no idea what you do to us! We are so crazy in love with you. Often, after you go to bed at night, we look at pictures of you and smile and comment on how wonderful we think you are. Sometimes we tiptoe into your room to look at you sleeping, and plant a kiss on your head.

You have taught me what love is all about. What the deepest, truest, most raw kind of love is all about. I had no idea this kind of feeling existed until I met you. You have taught me a lot of things! Before you came along, I was never really sure how to act around children, and now I am comfortable around them. You have taught me patience.. sometimes it takes you a long time to eat a meal or to get up the stairs, but there is nothing in the world that I would rather do than wait and let you achieve those things on your own.

You turned one year old an hour ago. Dada and I went into your room to kiss you at the exact minute you were born.. 11:30pm Florida time, 8:30pm California time. We held hands and just looked at you. I started to cry tears of happiness because I feel so blessed and lucky to have you in my life. Thank you for being my daughter. I love you so very much!

Happy Birthday!!

XOXO
Love,
Ma-mum

These are pictures of you at one year old!

Here you are cuddling while you sleep with your new elephant, Mr. Heffalump Soft.

Here you are after you woke up, with the messiest hair you have ever had!

Here you are after I combed your hair, and you are playing with the toys Omi and Opa got you for your birthday.

Here you are at Chuck E. Cheese's! We took you there for your birthday dinner. You are eating a french fry.

Here you are checking out the games at Chuck E. Cheese.

Here you are crawling on the floor at Chuck E. Cheese. You still don't feel like walking!

Here you are on the clock swing at Chuck E. Cheese. You had fun on the rides.

************** One year ago today **************

Omi is holding you after you were born. In this picture you were only a few minutes old!

Omi is giving you a snuggle after you were born.

You were born at home. This is our first family picture. You were less than an hour old.

Here you are two days old, on the way to visit the midwife's office.

My little lion

2008-11-07T01:08:00.005-05:00

FINALLY, here are pictures of Maddie in the Halloween costume I made. My first ever sewing project!! If you want the "recipe", let me know!

Grrrr....

Pumpkin Patch

2008-10-31T01:24:00.006-04:00

On Sunday it was time for Madeline's first visit to the pumpkin patch! She wasn't entirely too sure what to make of it, but the rest of us sure had fun watching her! She looked at the turkey and goats, rode a pony named Rainbow, and stood in front of the "how tall this fall" ruler!

I'm going to go ahead and just post some pictures. I have to get to sewing her Halloween costume.. my first ever sewing project. We'll see how it turns out. Stay tuned for those pictures!

Wish I had a camera..

2008-10-24T00:26:00.003-04:00

Seriously, where's a camera when you need it?

We have a serious ant problem right now. Madeline was in the tub and an ant was crawling around the rim. She started poking at it with her finger, in that cute way that babies do with all the other fingers tucked in tightly, when suddenly the ant disappeared.

It had crawled onto her finger. I held her hand and showed her the ant crawling around on her. She stared it for a moment, looked at me, and exclaimed.. "Doggie!" with a big smile on her face.

THEN.. after her bath I wrapped her up in her towel and took her to her room where I unwrapped her. I put her down and went back to the bathroom to hang up her towel. When I walked back into her room she had already crawled over to her toys. Mind you, still nude. I picked her up and apparently she had sat on her pacifier. When I picked her up it got stuck between her butt cheeks as her legs straightened out. Soooo funny to see a pacifier sticking out of your babies "other" cheeks!! Hahah!

October

2008-10-20T06:33:00.005-04:00

Madeline is 11 months old. I can't believe an entire year has almost gone by since my baby was born. I can't tell you how many times I have heard phrases such as "it'll go by so fast" and "don't blink, she'll be grown before you know it". Now that I'm living it I am realizing it's so so true.

My baby is turning into a little girl. She has a mind of her own, she's super smart, she gets attitude, she has developed a longer memory, she is always happy, she is the joy of my life.

Soon she'll be one year old.

Let me update you on what's been going on the past month!

Madeline is STILL not walking yet! She has been standing on her legs for a long time now, and she even dances. But she doesn't feel like taking a step. She can get from A to B faster by crawling.. and she crawls fast! Which is fine with me! She'll do plenty of walking I am sure. She likes to slap slap slap her hands on the ground when she crawls fast. It's just funny that she is talking before she is walking! It doesn't surprise me though.. she's always singing and chatting. I bet she'll be like her Daddy and need to always have noise coming out of her mouth. :)

It's so awesome to see Maddie's memory emerging. A few days ago it was full moon, and when she woke up at 6am the moon was still shining brightly into her window. I pointed to it and repeated Moon! to her a few times. She stared at it and pointed and worked her mouth into saying moon. The rest of the morning was spent looking at the moon every once in a while. The cool part is that the NEXT morning she woke up and was looking for the moon again! Little things like this happen that make me just swell with pride.

Sometimes when Madeline's concentration is elsewhere I just stare at her. I am so amazed by her. I am so in love with her. Anyway..

She's learned a whole slew of new words.

She knows:
Button = buthim-buthim-buthim
Pretty = Pitty
Mike = Mmmmmmite. A relative who is doing our house remodel.
Opa = Papa. Her grandfather, my dad.
Tante = This one has a variety of sounds still. It means aunt.
Boobie = Started as Bap-boo but is now Boooo-tee. As in, can I please nurse?
Dada = Dada. As in.. Dada.
Doggie = Dah-Dee
Thank you = Dee-Doo
Uh-Oh = Ah....... Ooooh.
Cheese = Theeth. As in when finding the camera on the floor and handing it to me and posing with a smile. What a ham.
Book = Boo.
EIEIO = As in Please read me my favorite book "Old McDonald Had a Farm"
Boo! = Bvv.
Moon = Mmm or Mmmun while pointing to the sky.
Wee Wee Wee = Vee-Vee-Vee-Vee.. and so on. As in, please play This Little Piggy with my toes.
Ouch = Owf. As in: Sorry I just (bit your boo-tee, pulled your hair) again Mama.

Does she say Mama yet? No. But when she sees me? She calls out BOO-TEE! I have a sneaking suspicion she has decided that is my name.

Silver Screen Saturday

2008-09-20T19:36:00.005-04:00

Here is a video and some pictures of our family outting to the park last week. I am sure it will make you smile, just make sure to have your volume turned on!

Words

2008-09-16T01:27:00.002-04:00

Madeline knows 5 words!

Dada = pronounced... "Dat-da".

Mama = pronounced "Ba-bah" with a wide open mouth.

Doggie = pronounced like an English person saying daddy.. "dah-dee". The cat is also called a Dah-dee.

Ouch = pronounced "Wow-f" with pursed lips blowing air at the end. She thinks this is what hair pulling is called and says "wowf" right before she makes a grab for a fistful of hair. I have to tell her "No ouch, Maddie!" She understands, and shakes her head no.

Purple = pronounced "Bap-boo". Said randomly throughout the day. This is also what she sometime calls her book "Violet's House". The grapes and the rug and the roof are purple and I point that out to her.

Maddie is aaaallllwwwaaayyyysss babbling. I mean like.. always. Talking while twirling her tongue around her mouth, smacking her lips, whispering, shouting.. I had a feeling she'd be a talker like her Daddy when she started squeaking before she was even completely born. That's right, only her head was out and she was already making noise. As I've said before.. it's a VERY strange thing to hear your vagina crying.

She turned 10 months old yesterday. I can't believe how fast the time has gone. My dad always used to say stuff to me about how time goes faster the older you get. I never understood what he meant. After all, it takes FOREVER for summer break to get here when you're a 3rd grader. I guess when you cherish the time you have, you want it to last forever, and it just goes by way too fast.

Molie molie molie molie..

2008-09-14T08:02:00.003-04:00

What movie is that from, anyway?

SO.. last Tuesday I had a mole removed from my back. It had been bothering me for about 6 months now. It was occasionally itchy and kind of just gave me this dull "feeling" that I can't really describe. Since my new job health insurance kicked in on September 1st, I immediately made an appointment with my old dermatologist. I have so many moles on my body that I really look like a chocolate chip cookie. I visit the dermatologist regularly.

So I told him this mole had been bothering me. I tried to express to him without scaring myself with my words that it had been worrying me. He took a look at it and said it looked irritated, probably from my bra strap. To myself I thought.. ya except my bra doesn't go that far down my back. He sliced it off.

Today the doctor himself called me. He said that he looked at my stupid mole under the microscope and noticed several abnormal looking cells. He shipped it off to the lab where they double confirmed it for him. Yes there were abnormal cells in the stupid mole....... but they were not cancerous.

Hallelujah.

I recommend everyone try to avoid direct sun as much as possible. You may have noticed from my previous posts that I keep Maddie dressed in a sun-suit when she goes swimming. I even got a nice hot pink shirt for myself!

Please check out the website where I purchased them. The woman started the company in honor of her husband, whom she lost to skin cancer at a very young age.

*** http://www.uvskinz.com/ ***

Wow!

2008-09-07T01:34:00.002-04:00

Guess who's standing????

Yesterday I opened the drawer in my parents kitchen dedicated to collecting countless plastic bags. Madeline loves to stand there and pull out all the bags. She is so helpful! Anyway, I stood her up next to the drawer which was stuffed to the gills, expecting her to reach forward and hold on to the side of the drawer, when instead she skipped the holding on part and just started pulling out bags! She stood there for about 15 seconds before plopping down on her behind.

Today John, Madeline and I went to a neighborhood picnic where my parents live. There was a ton of kids, bounce houses and a miniature train to ride on! There was a mommy sitting in the grass with a little boy who looked to be about Maddie's age. I held Madeline's hands and stood her in the grass so she could make friends. Once she finally put both of her feet down she walked over to the little boy named Nicholas. John turned on the camera and recorded her first kiss as she leaned forward with a wide open mouth and planted one on his face. It was adorable!

After they looked at each other for about 3 minutes and then lost interest, Madeline started "walking" around. I decided to let go of her hands and see if she would stand up again like she did yesterday. She plopped straight down again, but then was in a quandary because she didn't want to stand but she didn't want to be in the grass either! What to do!! She propped herself on her hands and feet and kind of wobbled there for a second before picking up her hands and ending up in a squat. She slowly started to straighten her legs.. and then was completely standing! Dada got it all on camera too.

You may be thinking.. "Seriously?? A post this long for standing up?" You betcha!! I'm darn proud of my little girl! :)

The Beach!

2008-08-29T19:06:00.011-04:00

Today Madeline went to the beach for the very first time!

We went in the afternoon when the sun was low and we could enjoy the salt water air.

Daddy held her over the water, but forgot that she is a lot shorter than he is, and she got splashed by a very small wave. She got goosebumps shortly thereafter, so we only spent about 20 minutes at the beach. :) We weren't planning on staying very long anyway.

Madeline did not care too much for the sand. She did not want to put her feet down, much the same as her reaction to grass.

We got lots of fantastic pictures!

Apparently sand tastes yucky!

Speaking of pictures, when I'm off work for my weekend John and I will work on the pictures for this post. It's taking a lot of courage for me to post the photos, because many of you readers I see face to face on a regular basis! I am hoping that by posting them, something inside you will spark.. and you will learn to be proud of yourselves! Something that I am working on myself.

I hope you enjoyed the beach pictures!

My post-baby body.

2008-08-28T01:15:00.003-04:00

Many people believe that having a baby "ruins" a woman's body. That a woman should look the same way as a mother that she did as a young girl. Have you ever seen a 90 year old woman that you could have mistaken for a 15 year old girl? I didn't think so.

I believe a person's body is a canvas of the life they have lived. Someone with wrinkles around their eyes are from the smiles they had on their family vacation. And someone with a scar on their leg from the time they went scuba diving and got bitten by a shark proudly displays the scar and brags about it. From the time we are young we get marks and scars on our bodies that are a timeline of our experiences.

My body, for example, chronicles my life's events.. I have a scar on my arm from just this past June when I reached into the oven and touched it to the hot rack and got a big long blister. It's still pink and it gets pinker in the sun. I have a scar on my little toe from when I dropped a bottle of shampoo on it in the shower in John's little apartment. I have a scar on my right pinky finger from slamming it in the screen door when I was probably about 10. I have a scar on the top side of my right wrist from reaching into my parrot's cage when I was young and tried to bite me.. I jerked my hand away and scraped my arm on his cage. I have a 2 inch scar on my left leg from when I was in high school. I was on the track team and I was competing in high jump. I landed funny and the spike on the bottom of my shoe impaled my leg and tore downwards. I have a couple of scars on my face from having large moles removed. I have stretch mark scars on my breasts and hips that have faded into a pearly white color from when I was a teenager going through puberty. I have small new red stretch marks on my breasts from them filling up with milk to feed my baby.

So what I don't understand is why we as women are shamed into believing that the scars our bodies obtain while we are pregnant are these awful hideous ugly marks that need to be hidden from view. Why is the scar on my leg that I got from a spike going into my leg considered cool, but the scars on my breasts considered ugly? I HAD A BABY for crying out loud! How cool is that???

Why would I want to look the same way I did before I had a baby? I am not by any means the same person I was before I gave birth. I am a MOTHER now! Inside AND out. My arms and back are muscular and strong from carrying around a growing-like-a-weed baby. My breasts are full and round from filling up with milk, and soft and jiggly from being emptied over and over. My stomach is soft and fluffy and makes a perfect spot for my baby to rest while she is nursing. I am more curvy now than before I had my baby. I now have boobs and hips. Yay!

Maybe when I get home I will add some pictures with this post of the body I once had and the body I have now.. but only if I am brave enough. Won't you encourage me? :)

What kind of scars do you proudly display? What kind of marks do you hide?

2008-08-26T13:10:00.001-04:00

Hey everyone!!

Check out my friend Marla's blog. She's new to blogging and needs lots of encouragement, so give her some love!

hbmommy.blogspot.com

Food!

2008-08-13T23:59:00.000-04:00

I am so excited I can hardly contain myself!! John and Madeline and I moved into our house last week. The walls were painted, the carpet was put in, and our beds were set up, but the downstairs is pretty much useless for the time being. We have no couches, no washer or dryer, no kitchen cabinets, and no appliances what so ever. As in no fridge in which to store food. No stove on which to cook soup. No oven in which to make a casserole.

But tomorrow... TOMORROW we get our refrigerator!! Do you know what that means??? I will get to go to the market and purchase glorious fruits and vegetables!! We have been living off of pizza and fast food for a very long and greasy week now. I think I will do some kind of a grease fast and just live off of fruits and vegetables and fish and nuts for the rest of the month. It will be so good for me. Also for future babies, which I hope are very near future babies. I would like to start working on that soon.

Bianka will return shortly...

2008-08-11T01:42:00.002-04:00

She is currently working on fixing up her new house and is still without Internet access (yet another reason she needs a BlackBerry!). In fact, she's without a kitchen sink, fridge, or even flooring! She promises to return to blogging as soon as she can...hopefully this week! In the meantime, here is a picture of Maddie to hold us all over...

~Jenn

Busy bees!

2008-07-31T13:28:00.003-04:00

We sure have been busy around here, here being our new home in Southern California! John arrived by car last Wednesday. I was so excited to see him, but guess who was even more excited? Madeline! I don't think she understood that he was about to arrive, since she and I don't speak the same language yet and she wasn't getting it when Mama said "Daddy's coming today!!". However, when he got out of the car... she about smiled her face off and kicked her feet to the moon!

We were waiting in the driveway for him when we knew he was close, just watching the grass grow. When he pulled up, I walked towards his car and Madeline watched it drive up. John stepped out of the car with a huge smile on his face and Madeline was just watching him. John then said a very enthusiastic Hellooooooo! and I wish I would have been video taping the reunion. I didn't know a baby was capable of so much excitement! Once she realized it was her Dada walking up to her, Dada who she hadn't seen in eleven days, she went nuts!

He hugged her and kissed her while she squealed and smiled. It brought tears to my eyes.

After relaxing for a few days (a cross country road trip is tiring!) we got to work. The carpet that we had originally chosen at Lowe's when we still lived in Florida had been discontinued by the time I got to California. I went ahead and picked a new one. It was scheduled to be installed this week... however when I called on Monday to follow up with them, I was told that it was backordered and wouldn't be installed until at least August 6th! I'm quite over living out of a suitcase at this point, plus Maddie has a hard enough time sleeping as it is, that I just wanted to get us all into our own house and into our own beds.

I decided to call Empire since they install carpet the next day. We got a quote that was almost double what Lowe's was going to charge!! While the salesman was there measuring, John wandered over to our new neighbors house and they told him about Drake's in Huntington Beach. To make a long boring story nice and short, we cancelled our Lowe's order, cancelled Empire Carpet, and are going with Drake's. They are installing our carpet RIGHT NOW THIS VERY SECOND!! YAY!!!!!!! (We met with them at 5pm on Tuesday.) We got the exact same carpet that we were going to choose from Empire for about half the price, and installed 2 days sooner!

Our POD arrived, my car arrived, the paint is being completed downstairs, our kitchen cabinets are ripped out and being rebuilt.. it's a mess but I can hardly wait to get settled in!

We're moving in!

2008-07-23T15:50:00.000-04:00

Our furniture and precious stuff is scheduled to arrive this Saturday!! Too bad the carpet won't be in yet. Our stuff will probably just have to be loaded into the garage.

We had lots of people offering to help us move in. If you are interested in helping, please reply with your phone number or email address or however you want me to contact you, and I will give you our new address and other miscellaneous details.

We will need help this weekend with unloading the truck, then again after the carpet is installed to assemble and move furniture.

Can't wait to see everyone!!

Love,Bianka

P.S. The baby sitting help slot is already filled in. Sorry. :)

Happy Anniversary!

2008-07-21T14:09:00.003-04:00

Happy 2 year anniversary to my husband and I! I wish we could be together today, but alas, he is currently leaving Texas and getting into New Mexico. (He'll be here on Wednesday!!)

Dear Boo,

Thank you for everything. Thank you for always being there for me. Thank you for all of your sacrifices. Thank you for always making me laugh. Thank you for being the best grilled cheese sandwich maker this side of the universe. Thank you for being so kind to everyone you meet, sometimes to a fault. Thank you for knowing me better than I know myself. Thank you for our baby. Thank you oh so much for our baby. Thank you for being a good a-DA! (da-da). Thank you for loving me.

Love forever,
Poodle

If anyone is wondering how we met......... (stop me if I've told this story here before..)

One day about 5 years ago, my parents wanted to send my sister and I on a cruise together. Any cruise of our choosing. So we opened up the Auto Club catalog and started browsing. We weren't interested in a booze cruise but instead were looking for something unique. In the end we decided on a Mississippi River paddle wheel boat cruise. It would go from Memphis Tenessee to New Orleans Louisiana in March. We would see all the Antebellum Civil War era homes and their gardens and the beginning of the spring time.

Fast foward to March 2004. My sister and I begin our trip. We board the boat in Memphis and my future husband tells his buddy "I'm going to marry that one." Hubby was working on the boat as a table busser. One night the boat docked early in a city called Natchez, Mississippi. The entire crew (being young people) and my sister and I (being like 2 of only 5 people under the age of 65 on the boat) got off and hung out at this ugly little scary bar with a scary bartender. Anyway, I had a cocktail or two, and so did John. Which is funny because we both rarely drink. So John had the courage to come up to me and kiss my hand. We spent the next 3 or 4 days of the cruise together as much as we could just talking talking talking. It was one of the best weeks of my life. I had so much fun!

Four weeks later John had sold all of his furniture and his car in Orlando and moved to California to be with me! 6 months later we were engaged. Now I'm his wife and his baby-mama. I couldn't be happier. I love you, husband!

Harmful Plastics

2008-07-16T18:37:00.005-04:00

I recently sent an email to a few people that I thought might be interested in this topic. I feel it's pretty important, so I decided to share it with all of you. Look on the bottom of the plastic container you are using for the recycle number (the number inside of the triangle).

Do not use plastic #'s 1, 3, 6, and 7. It's probably best to avoid using plastic as much as you can just to be sure. For example, use a mug at work instead of refilling your plastic bottle, and put your frozen lunch (i.e. Lean Cuisine) on a paper or glass plate to microwave instead of microwaving it in the plastic container it comes in. Read the article below for an explanation.

Harmful Plastics

Recently, there has been increasing controversy over the use of plastics as food and beverage storage containers. There are both health and environmental risks which must be taken in consideration. Plastic is non-biodegradable and remains in landfills, where it leaches harmful chemicals into the soil and water. Plastics are made using petroleum (crude oil), a non-sustainable, polluting and limited resource. Plastics are numbered 1-7. The type of plastic (number) is listed on the bottom of the container. Each plastic is composed of different chemicals and each carries unique health concerns. Fetuses are especially sensitive, and health problems may take place in utero, long before birth.

PETE #1 (Polyethylene Terephthalate)

* water bottles, soda bottles, cooking oil bottles, and peanut butter jars

* not designed to be reused

* break down easily, leaching chemicals into your body

* reusing these containers causes microscopic scratches and cracks, which serve as reservoirs for bacteria

* phthalates increase the risk of reproductive cancers and infertility

HDPE #2 (High Density Polyethylene)

* detergent bottles and milk bottles

* generally considered safer for storing food and water

PVC #3 (Polyvinyl Chloride)

* made of vinyl and used in medical equipment, plastic furniture, shrink wrap, and liquid detergent containers

* no food or drink should ever be stored in these containers

* dioxins contribute to lung cancer, endocrine and autoimmune conditions

* phthalates cause liver, kidney, and testicular damage

LDPE #4 (Low Density Polyethylene)

* plastic bags and food storage containers

* generally considered a safer plastic

PP #5 (Polypropylene)

* bottle caps, drinking straws, syrup and yogurt containers, Rubbermaid®

* considered a safer type of plastic

PS #6 (Polystyrene)

* Styrofoam

* especially toxic when heated (i.e. when used for coffee or take-out)

* causes reproductive problems and cancer

Other #7 (Polycarbonate)

* plastic baby bottles, sippy cups, water cooler containers, microwave dishes, inside lining of cans, utensils, and Nalgene bottles

* bisphenol-A disrupts hormones, and mimics estrogen

* minute amounts of this substance can result in: reproductive disorders such infertility, endometriosis, fibroids, low sperm count; prostate, breast, uterine, ovarian cancer; hypo- or hyper- thyroidism; early puberty; hyperactivity; obesity

* new bio-based plastics labeled #7 are apparently “safer” to use (though there is no way to tell if the plastic is new bio plastic or old polycarbonate.)

What can you do to protect yourself? Although it is impossible to eliminate exposure to plastics, here are some tips to help limit exposure:

* Never use plastics #3, 6, 7

* Only use #1 plastic bottles one time (better to avoid altogether)

* Store food in ceramic or glass containers (especially fatty foods)

* Use glass or stainless steel for filtered tap water

* Never microwave anything plastic (even if it is “microwave safe”)

* Never use Styrofoam for hot drinks or food

For more information, visit www.iatp.org/foodandhealth

California

2008-07-13T21:38:00.000-04:00

Baby, cat and myself have arrived back in California. Husband is packing up a few last items then heading out here by car. I'll probably see him in about 10 days. I am pooped. Goodnight!

Wet kisses

2008-07-10T00:00:00.003-04:00

The other morning I was woken up by a pair of wet squishy lips planted on my own. No joke! Maddie woke up without a peep and the first thing she did was give me a slobbery wet kiss. I think that was the sweetest wake up call I have ever had.

T minus 2 days until we move back to California. Bittersweet.

Mooooooving

2008-07-03T00:00:00.002-04:00

I'm so sorry that I'm not posting anything right now, but we're in the midst of moving cross country.. down to the wire now. 10 days left until we leave. There's much to do and blogging is on the back burner!!

I'll be back soon! I promise!

Water bug

2008-06-23T19:26:00.004-04:00

Look at my baby girl swimming! I'm just as proud as a peacock right now! :)

Chain reaction.

2008-06-19T23:33:00.002-04:00

Because Madeline turned 6 months old in May we started feeding her smooshed baby food.
Because we started feeding Madeline smooshed baby food she wasn't nursing as often.
Because Madeline wasn't nursing as often my boobs weren't making as much milk as they used to make.
Because my boobs weren't making as much milk as they used to make my hormones were adjusting accordingly.
Because my hormones were adjusting accordingly, for the first time in 510 days, for the first time since January 2007, for the first time in nearly a year and a half... I got my period.

Darn it.

Picto-blog

2008-06-18T21:41:00.010-04:00

It's been a week since I've posted anything. We've been so busy with moving that I'm having a hard time sitting down to write stuff! We got an offer on our house (yay!) and will be moving in about three weeks (yay! and sad!). We're packing our pod full of art and furniture and Christmas decorations and books and stuff stuff stuff. I hope it all fits!

Anyhow, I'm going to post a few pictures since it's been a while since I've done that.

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Maddie's first swimming lesson. June 2nd 2008

She already swims under water and today she got her first ribbon for doing such a good job! She is the youngest one in the class. Maddie is 7 months old and the next oldest is 14 months. John stood Maddie up next to that little girl and they are the same height.. haha I am going to have children taller than me I imagine!

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Maddie standing up by herself for the very first time! June 7th 2008

I wasn't aware of this, but I guess sometimes when babies pull themselves up to standing for the first time, they don't know how to get down. So Maddie's standing there giggling and singing and I'm snapping pictures.. and she's still standing there.. and still standing there.. and finally she gives me a little complaint whimper. So I pick her up and her poor little legs are trembling because her muscles are so tired!! Now she pulls herself up every chance she gets and has even begun walking herself along the couch a little bit. And twice yesterday she let go and was STANDING for just a second before she plopped on her bottom. I think we have an early walker on our hands!

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Father's Day. June 15th 2008

John said he felt honored to be able to call himself a father. Maddie learned how to say Da-da on the 11th after I sat next to her in the car going somewhere and "talking" back and forth with her. I just repeated the sound to her.. now she says it all the time! The rest of that first day though all we heard all day long was DADADADADADADA at the top of her lungs! She was so proud of her new sound!

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Maddie's first wedding. June 13th 2008

The lovely couple (our lovely neighbors) have been boyfriend and girlfriend for 19 years. They got married finally on Friday the 13th.. I guess they figured any bad luck has surely happened by now! Yay for them! Oh, Madeline belched loudly right at the beginning of the ceremony. Such a classy girl!

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Here are some more random pictures that I've taken the past few weeks for you to enjoy!

Crawling:

Eating carrots:
Lounging on our bed:

Ham

2008-06-11T00:10:00.002-04:00

Take a gander.. I figured I wouldn't just limit the fun to aunts, uncles and grandparents!

http://www.parents.com/app/sharemy/photoDetails.jsp?photoId=198300679

Please rate AND recommend all 6 of Maddie's pictures! Like every day. 5 times a day. I know, totally being a ham here, but it sure is fun!

Thank youuuuu!

Sweet ride..

2008-06-08T23:10:00.003-04:00

One of the sweeter things in life is going to the grocery store and ending up with a shopping cart that runs as smooth as silk.. no jumping, shaking, swaying, pulling, rattling, buzzing..

I wanted to do laps around the store!

By the way.. has anyone else tried the blogroll that blogger added? Scroll down and see mine on the right!

Parenting Prep In Ten Easy Steps

2008-06-05T01:37:00.003-04:00

I about died laughing when I read this!! Tears are running down my face.. probably because I was biting my cheeks to keep from laughing out loud while the babe sleeps. I found it on a friends friends blog. She is at Mama Manifesto. Enjoy!

PARENTING PREPARATION IN 10 EASY STEPS

Lesson 1
Before you finally go ahead and have children, find a couple who already are parents and berate them about their...
1. Methods of discipline
2. Lack of patience
3. Appallingly low tolerance levels
4. Allowing their children to run wild
5. Suggest ways in which they might improve their child's breastfeeding, sleep habits, toilet training, table manners, and overall behavior.
Enjoy it because it will be the last time in your life you will have all the answers.

Lesson 2
A really good way to discover how the nights might feel...
1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from 5pm to 10pm carrying a wet bag weighing approx. 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly.
2. At 10pm, put the bag down gently, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep.
3. Get up at midnight and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1am.
4. Set alarm for 3am.
5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2am and watch an infomercial.
6. Go to bed at 2:45.
7. Get up at 3am when alarm goes off.
8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 4am.
9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive.)Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together.

Lesson 3
Can you stand the mess children make? To find out...
1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains.
2. Hide a piece of raw chicken behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.
3. Stick your fingers in the flower bed.
4. Then rub them on the clean walls.
5. Take your favorite book, photo album, etc. Wreck it.
6. Spill milk on your new pillows. Cover the stains with crayons.
How does that look?

Lesson 4
Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.
1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh.
2. Attempt to put the octopus in the bag so that none of the arms hang out.
Time allowed for this- all morning.

Lesson 5
Forget the BMW and buy a mini-van. And don't think that you can leave it out in the driveway spotless and shining. Family cars don't look like that.
1. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment. Leave it there.
2. Get a dime. Stick it in the CD player.
3. Take a family size package of chocolate cookies. Mash them into the back seat. Sprinkle Cheerios all over the floor, them smash them with your foot.
4. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.

Lesson 6
1. Go to the grocery store. Take the closest thing you can find to a pre-school child. (A full-grown goat is an excellent choice). If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat.
2. Buy your week's groceries without letting the goats out of your sight.
3. Pay for everything the goats eat or destroy.
Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.

Lesson 7
1. Hollow out a melon.
2. Make a small hole in the side.
3. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side.
4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane.
5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone.
6. Tip half into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air.
You are now ready to feed a 9 month-old baby.

Lesson 8
Learn the names of every character from all shows on PBS, the Disney Channel and Noggin. Watch nothing else on TV but shows from these channels for at least 5 years. (I know, you're thinking "what's Noggin?") Exactly the point.

Lesson 9
Make a recording of Fran Drescher saying 'mommy' repeatedly. (Important: no more than a four second delay between each 'mommy'; occasional crescendo to the level of supersonic jet is required). Play this tape in your car everywhere you go for the next four years. You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler.

Lesson 10
Start talking to an adult of your choice. Have someone else continually tug on your skirt hem, shirt sleeve, or elbow while playing the 'mommy' tape made from lesson 9 above. You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a child in the room.

Wiping faces

2008-06-04T13:51:00.004-04:00

Once upon a time I was naive. I would see mothers wiping their baby's faces fast and vigorously, and babies pushing their mother's hands away and protesting loudly. I said to myself "I'M not going to be one of THOSE mothers." I thought how I'll wipe my baby's face nice and gently and she'll find it to be a pleasant experience and will allow me to do it.

Hahahhahahahahahhahahaah!

Now I understand WHY mothers wipe their kids faces like that. The kids don't protest because mom is wiping too fast.. it's the other way around. Mom has to be aggressive with the wiping because the kid protests. I started off wiping my daughters face nice and gently when she started having solid food.. that lasted, oh, about 2 days.

Now I go in fast and hard and avoid her protesting hands as efficiently as possible. She starts protesting even before I've touched her, when I'm only waking towards her with the towel. Then she grabs my hands and the towel and whatever else she can get into her sticky fingers.

Here's a question for experienced moms: What on earth to wipe first? The high chair tray, hands, or face? Because it seems whatever is cleaned first inevitably gets sticky again right away by whatever part has not been wiped yet.

Trash..

2008-06-03T22:29:00.003-04:00

My dear friend Jenn was visiting me over the weekend. We started comparing our husbands habits...

As is Jenn's, my husband is fantastic. He is absolutely perfect for me. I couldn't have asked for a better man to love me and our baby girl.

HOWEVER.. as most wonderful husbands do, he comes with some bad habits.

Since I am currently a stay at home mom I do the majority of the chores around the house. Husband has a minimal amount of things that I ask him to do. Some of them are please brush your teeth, please take a shower.. stuff like that. Another is the trash. He is responsible for taking the trash to the curb twice a week. Trash day is always the same day of the week. Last week I decided to try a little experiment to see how long it would take him to do this one thing without me asking him to do it.

Our trash can got very full. I started smashing the trash down until it wouldn't smash anymore. I started a new bag on the floor next to the trash can and started filling that up. My stinky fish trash even ended up in there. Do you think he noticed? Nooooo.. not even when he had to kick the second bag out of the way to sit down and eat breakfast. I finally caved and asked him (a few times) can you please take out the trash, dear sweet husband?

Are all husbands like this? I'm not complaining, because he truly is a wonderful sweet man that I love to pieces, I just think it's funny. Selective seeing goes along with selective hearing I suppose!

Shampoo

2008-05-28T10:15:00.010-04:00

Me: Do you need anything from the store?

Husband: Yes, I need shampoo. Pantene Pro-V please.

Me: Ok.

.. I drive to the store, stand in front of the shampoos, see about 800 varieties of Pantene Pro-V, and call husband..

Me: What kind of Pantene Pro-V do you need? There's a bunch.

Husband: (Going to the shower to look) The one with Iox.

Me: Iox?

Husband: Yes, Iox for stronger hair.

Me: Hmm.. (wondering what kind of new product this was, suddenly spot it.) Oh, do you mean the one for TEN TIMES STRONGER HAIR?

--10x stronger hair is what it says. Sigh--

Poop

2008-05-27T21:19:00.003-04:00

See those pictures down below? That sweet adorable happy smiling face? Imagine it screaming in pain. This is going to be one of those T.M.I. entries, so if you are that reader that claims I "say too much", it's time for you to stop reading now. Seriously. Stop.

My sweet baby girl has started sampling solid food. She has had pears and apples and sweet potatoes and peas. She loooooooves every new flavor! Sometimes she'll roll the first bite around in her mouth for a moment before swallowing it, but a few moments later she'll open her mouth like a little bird waiting for more. Up until a few weeks ago Madeline was strictly breastfed. Now she gets fruits and veggies and rice cereal in addition to the breast milk.

Breast fed babies don't poop every day. If I recall it's because their bodies use so much of the nutrients in the milk that there's not much wasted. Anyhow, strictly breastfed babies have pretty soft poop, so going from breast milk to pureed fruits and vegetables makes the poop change. It has become a little less soft. In FACT, last week Maddie had a 2 foot long poop. I kid you not. Ask Jenn.. my husband took a picture of it and I think we showed it to her. (I have put Maddie on the toilet since she was about 6 weeks old.) I am not going to post the picture on here, but I'll email it to you if you want me to. :-)

So anyway, I've been used to Maddie only pooping 3 or so times a week. I started to get a little concerned when she didn't go at all over this holiday weekend. We started going on 4, then 5, then 6 days today. She had been making straining sounds, but with no results. So this morning when we woke up she was straining soooo hard and grunting soooo loud and her face was turning super red. I was really worried about her because she started getting a little distressed too. I put her on the toilet and she started straining even harder. Soon her grunts turned into crying and occasionally a high pitched scream. After a few minutes a hard little poop pebble came out.

We began our day, Maddie on the floor with some toys and me checking my emails. I called her doctor and the nurse wrote down my questions and said she'd call me back after she had a chance to talk to the doctor. Soon Maddie started straining again and I whisked her off to the toilet. Her grunting quickly became cries again, so when her Daddy came to check on us I asked him to call the doctor and tell them what was going on. The nurse told us to come by in an hour.

The doctor put my mind at ease a little, saying Maddie at least had bowel sounds and was passing gas (signs that everything is functioning as it should be). She suggested some good old fashioned prune juice diluted with water. She said avoid bananas and rice cereal, bananas and rice are constipating. And wouldn't you know it, her rice cereal is iron fortified! Iron is another culprit in constipation. On the way home I stopped at the store and got the prune juice and checked for prune baby food. Yay! The brand I prefer (Earth's Best) has mashed prunes! We came home and she loved that flavor too.

My mom had suggested putting a little Vaseline in her rectum, and the doctor suggested a glycerin suppository, to make things slip out a little easier. So I laid Maddie on the bed on a towel and got a q-tip ready and went hunting for the Vaseline. Maddie started straining so I whisked her off to the toilet again..... and man oh man was it ever bad. She was screaming. Shrieking. Just all out bloody murder. It broke my heart and tore me to pieces to see her in so much pain. If I hadn't just been to the doctor to know that she was ok I would have called 9-1-1. Her face turned red and tears ran down her cheeks and she was crying and grunting and screaming.

Here's where my story gets really graphic, so if you're eating you might want to come back later.

A bit of poop started to work it's way out and I wanted so badly to help her feel better. It was totally stuck, so I bent her forward and used toilet paper to see if I could help it work it's way down. All it did was break off. She was still screaming and in so much pain so I took her to the bed where the towel still was and I used the q-tips to take pieces of the stuck poop out of her rectum. I got a teensy bit out but then the poop went back up. Maddie stopped crying and caught her breath and I cleaned up the soiled q-tips. I couldn't find the stupid Vaseline so I grabbed some K-Y jelly (for kegel exercises, don't ask) when a few minutes later she started grunting and straining again. I squirted the k-y in her tushie crack and wet the q-tip and put that in her rectum. Her grunts were getting louder so off to the toilet we went again.

It was as bad as before. The shrieking and screaming and crying... I sat in front of her and hugged her while she sat on the pot. I just held her like that and let her hold on to me while she cried. But wouldn't you know it, after what seemed like eternity, out came a really hard, big, poop. I leaned back to look at her and she grabbed my shoulders and pulled herself closer to me and put her head back on my shoulder.

I have never felt more like a mother.

She had a total of 4 bowel moments this evening, each getting progressively softer and each with less crying. I think she was just sore from the first one. Thank goodness the worst of it is over. She will now be eating oatmeal instead of rice cereal. And thank goodness she likes prunes!

Thanks for letting me share.

Well?

2008-05-27T01:42:00.000-04:00

New color.. new title.. you like?